Father in law

It depends - is the mohawk really big or just a small one? I mean he would definitely stick out but hey everyone is going to be mesmerized by you

I think people will look at you no matter what. Also some people are not comfortable in formal or crowded settings. I know it stinks for him
not to be there but it is not worth the fight or stress.

Sorry but what's the problem? You can't police how other people choose to groom themselves. Everyone is going to be there for you and your FH. Some people don't like crowds and or big events. Others need to recharge their "people batteries" more quickly than others.. my father was like that. It's not personal. Focus on yourself, don't make a mountain over a molehill.

That's annoying but odds are you won't even notice on the day. Your guests will focus on you and your FH mostly. There will always be something else that catches their attention though. My grandmother had pink hair at my wedding. I didn't care but it drove my mom nuts. I wasn't planning on displaying any photos of her anyway so what do I care. 🤷‍♀️ You've said he is not the negotiating type. The fact that he told you in the first place makes me wonder if he wants a reaction out of you. There will be other battles to wage in your life, this may not be one. Be annoyed, then let it go.

Every person in your wedding is a person first, with their own chosen hair styles and colors, facial hair, tattoos, scars, and personal jewelry. These are not ever your choice, as long as they are well groomed . You may say, I hope BM wear hair up or in a soft romantic do, a sggestion, but in the end everything is up to them not you, except the dress, or a multipart ensemble ( dress and jacket or matching stole, 3 piece suit.). And FOB, is family and only matches other men if he wants to, or can dress entirely differently, as he is family and not a chosen attendant whose clothes bride or groom may choose. And all other parents, MOB, FOG, MOG, all dress in their own choice of colors and styles. Family need not coordinate in any way with each other any wedding colors, or with GM or BM. They just need to choose something if the same formality as B and G or one step down. Someone who wears a Mohawk or two braids or magenta hair in real life, may wear them in the wedding. Just with the right formality ( at a formal affairs, jeweled hair ornaments might be appropriate, not dangling coke spoon necklaces or spray glittered hair) and basically clean tangle free hair. . . . No matter what the social occasion ( not work, the hosts it couple may not dictate specifically how other adults look, except for formality, and for appointed attendants or participants in a ceremony only, the color and style dress or suit of clothes. Otherwise, adults choose personal colors, style of hair, jewelry for themselves. Their identity. They are not (attendants and parents are not) me Del's ir actors paid $309 an hour to project the image you want. They are people chosen for an honorary position. . . This is not just the answer to the father with a Mohawk, but comes up again and again: you cannot require, any hairstyle of BM, and even if you buy them all matching jewelry, or robes, or shirts, or tiaras,. they are free to do what they want, wear them or their own they like better. Remember in this will help in lits of upcoming decisions. The fact that it is your wedding only applies to the suit of clothing for BM and GM, flower girls, etc. in the ceremony, nothing else for them, and nothing at all for family, or guests. Long-standing etiquette. Movies and TV shows lead you to think bride controls the wedding world, but only in make believe are petty dictators acceptable. 🙂

You can't change peoples hair just be glad you got a heads up.

Etiquette of what others do aside: Do not be so insecure! People are there to see you two, and a miniature horse led though by a bridle or a pair of golden retrievers in white vests could not take people's eyes off you for more than 2 minutes, all night, except when people are dancing with their own sweeties later on. You will be beautiful, polished and accenting your best features in gorgeous, fairy take clothes. Who cares what other people wear, when you are the star of the show? Have a little more confidence in how special you are, and less worry about other people taking attention. No worry wrinkles on your face, please, you glow and outshine everyone just by your happiness and appearance, not by worrying about any lesser beings.

Yeah, his head, his choice. You don't have to like it, but it would be super rude of you to say anything. Just let it go.

This is kind of like that old joke about the food in a restaurant being terrible AND the portions are so small! If you aren't happy with the way your FFIL looks/behaves, you probably shouldn't also complain that he won't stay long at the wedding.

Like other said, you can't control how others choose to look or act, and this one is definitely a good example of the importance of picking your battles. This is not a battle worth wasting your energy on.

View Quoted Comment

I like this response! I will also say that I agree with OP though... I know you can't, and should not, police everything about a person. But a mohawk is a hair style, that you choose to get up and style that way in the morning if I'm thinking of it right, if it's not the kind you shave. He'll be fine not having it that way for the wedding, it isn't like this has been a part of his identity for years, he's just being difficult. Wants to get out of there asap; being difficult. I'm sorry you have to deal with that. Even if it is the kind you shave: Why does he need to go get a drastic, attentiony hair cut right before the wedding? He does not. If you paid for all your bridesmaids to do their hair and asked them to put it in braided buns or whatever you wanted, no one would bat an eye, I think it's ok that she's asking the best man to not spike up his hair that day if it's a drastic mohawk. That is the sort of thing that you look at, it'll take some attention. It's different than someone having a big tattoo or a girl with brightly dyed hair, those are things that are a part of you and cant be changed, and the bride and groom accepted when they asked you to be in the bridal party. note: if one of my bridesmaids had bright blue hair when I asked her to be in my wedding, totally fine! But if a month before my wedding they said, "by the way, I'm dying my hair bright blue!" I'd probably be a bit taken back and ask if they could wait a month. Is having blue hair/a mohawk bad or a reason to keep someone out of your wedding party? Of course not. But is someone drastically changing their hairstyle to something a bit more attention grabbing right before your wedding, and then pointedly telling you "I'm doing this and there's nothing you can do about it?" rude? Heck yeah.
If it's a short sort of mohawk, he's getting his head shaved into it, not a hill to die on, let it go. Thats not a huge attention grabber. But if it's a spikey high sort of thing, thats a hair style, not a hair cut, and I think you can certainly ask he refrain, but once again, if he's a stubborn rude guy...maybe not a hill to die on.
At the end of the day though, Judith is right, even if he were to have a crazy mohawk, you're still going to be the star of the day! Just letting you know I agree with you is all.