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Dedicated November 2019

Family not coming

Kendra, on November 4, 2019 at 7:10 PM Posted in Planning 0 10

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I’m going to apologize for this, but I need to vent and if anyone has advice I would appreciate it.

My wedding is 6 hours from where I grew up, so I didn’t expect a ton of family friends to come down, but I was hoping my aunts, cousins, and grandparents would. I told everyone back home over a year in advance about our wedding date, and not a single extended family member is coming from my dads side. However, my extended on my moms side is coming. I just feel like it isn’t right that o have more family friends coming then family. I guess it shows who really cares.

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10 Comments

Latest activity by Laura, on November 5, 2019 at 6:35 PM

Super November 2021
Alejandra · on November 4, 2019 at 8:04 PM
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I’m so sorry. That’s rough. Have you talked to any of them about it? Have they given a reason?
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Dedicated November 2019
Kendra · on November 4, 2019 at 8:07 PM
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My aunt says it’s because she has to work. I know holiday weekends are hard for her to get off, that’s part of why I told her over a year at ago. But none if them have told me. It’s been through my parents
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on November 4, 2019 at 8:39 PM
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Travel is difficult for a lot of people. It could be health, it could be finances, it could be 10000 other reasons. The whole “if they want to come, they will be there” thing is false. You should have known going into it that you were likely to get more declines because you’re having a destination wedding, it’s unfortunate that it’s family.
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Dedicated November 2019
Kendra · on November 4, 2019 at 8:57 PM
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I know it isn’t financial or health. The part that really hurts is I told them well over a year before so they could try, and on top of it all they couldn’t even rsvp. They went to my mom and dad saying they weren’t coming.
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Master November 2019
Mrs. S · on November 4, 2019 at 9:14 PM
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My fiancé only has 2 people coming. It’s been really hurtful so I know how you feel :-(
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Master August 2019
Rebecca · on November 5, 2019 at 2:43 AM
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The only blood relative I had at my wedding was my father, because my mother's side refused to come. They were upset about the invites.
Weddings bring out the petty in people.
I'm sorry. But don't worry about more friends coming than family - they *are* your family... just not by DNA.
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Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on November 5, 2019 at 10:20 AM
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It's difficult, but that's the territory that comes with a wedding where guests need to travel. It's unfortunate, but try to treasure the ones that do travel and celebrate with you
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Lady · on November 5, 2019 at 12:05 PM
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Caytlyn is 100% right. The attitude you have about "if they care, they'll come" is so wrong. 6 hours is a long way to drive, expensive to fly to, even if they have the time off work. In a lot of jobs, it doesn't matter if you know something a year in advance, you may not get the weekend off. They did RSVP - just not to you directly.
It's totally ok to be disappointed that people can't come. But be a little upset, and move on - they're not doing anything wrong.
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Savvy January 2020
McKenzie · on November 5, 2019 at 1:20 PM
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Hopefully I won’t be in the same boat but my family lives 6hrs away too. I have no idea what to do. I want to have my wedding where I live (Grooms family lives 2:30hrs so they have to travel too. Both fams are on the opposite sides of us) but at the same time I know it’s going to be hard for my family to make it. My grandpa who will be giving me away at my wedding said that if it wasn’t where he lived then he wasn’t going idk if he was serious or not but ugh is it a struggle.
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Master October 2019
Laura · on November 5, 2019 at 6:35 PM
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I know it's hurtful. No one from my late mom's side was at my wedding, and only a 5 from my dad's side. Nearly everyone in my husband's family came. I know who I matter to. I'm so sorry you have to feel what I felt
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