Family Issues with Alcohol

LMac I do try to avoid the discussion but I was not there and they asked my mother. I know next time I see my Grandma she will address me about this and I want to be prepared with a response.

How many guests would drink? If this is a case where, say, your entire family is Mormon, and they're 95 of 100 guests, I guess I can see their point. Otherwise, I think you can respectfully explain that you're not serving hard liquor but that you do want to provide a nice experience for a variety of guests. Also, who's paying?

Agreed with Alyssa. That is the best way to handle it.

Just give her the reasoning people give on WW for why adult beverages should be provided at a wedding. She means a lot to you but please don't let it stress you. The reception is just for fun. You're marrying the love of your life, that's all that matters.

Just let her know that you appreciate her concerns and that you value her opinion but this is the ONE day that you and your FH will have and those that are close to you both are going to be there and it wouldn't be the same without you there. As for the bar just let her know that it's there as a option for guest to have. Some may need a glass or too to dance. Lol

"I love you and it would mean the world to me if you were there. This is how we've decided to host our reception, we will have a variety of non-alcoholic drinks available so that nobody goes thirsty" Next topic. Repeat as necessary.

Thank you guys. I am guessing at the most 50 out of 150 will drink. FH and myself are paying for it. My grandmother was abused by her alcoholic father and that is why she is so sensitive. I feel bad but I believe it would appear so rude if I didn't provide it for the percentage that would drink. I guess you guys are right. She is an adult and I can just tell her how much it means to me and hope she will understand and stay at least for dinner and our first dance..

Definitely call her bluff. When grandma goes off on you and says she won't attend the wedding if there is alcohol just tell her, "I am sorry to hear that. You will be missed." Don't negotiate.

Yes what Richard said. I'd be sure to reiterate gently that the alcohol is not meant to offend anyone, it's there for those who wish to imbibe and for those that don't, then have an iced tea.

All very good answers. Or, "Well, Grandma, when you get married again, you can have a dry wedding, but this is my wedding and we've already made the decision."

Good thing it's not your grandmother's wedding!!

My grandparents and a few other family members are very much against drinking as well so I feel your pain! However, at the end of the day, you and FH are the ones paying for it and like PP said, she's likely bluffing. When she confronts you about it, give a quick, concise answer and don't let the conversation drag out for too long. The longer the subject is being talked about, the more she will think about it and the more upset she will get. Good luck and know you are being a good hostess by providing alcohol!