Victoria
Just Said Yes June 2021

Etiquette for Asking Maid of Honor before Bridesmaids

Victoria, on November 6, 2019 at 9:45 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5
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Hi all!

Quick question- I got engaged in August and looking to have a June 2021 wedding! I have a rough idea of my bridesmaids, but I know for certain I want my sister to be my MOH! I was wondering if there are any "unspoken rules" about asking her to be my MOH now, but not asking my bridesmaids until several months from now?

When it boils down to it, I have a really cute proposal idea for my sister since she works at a bridal salon and I will have my first bridal appointment. This is why I am so eager to ask her now and would prefer to hold back with asking the bridesmaids until more details of my wedding are ironed out- I was just curious if people would think this is off-putting? Not that it should matter all that much!

Thanks!

5 Comments

  • B
    Super July 2018
    Brittany ·
    • Flag

    It's definitely a good idea to wait to ask your bridesmaids and put a lot of thought into it. A lot of times brides ask people early and then the friendship starts to fade out as the wedding gets closer and the bride is disappointed when she has bridesmaids that don't speak to her and don't want to attend things like the bachelorette.

    Since your sister will be your MOH it's okay to ask her much earlier than everyone else, I just recommend ask that she doesn't post about it on social media right away so that people don't start asking who else is in your bridal party. I'd recommend waiting to decide on bridesmaids until around April 2020.

    If it helps, my husband asked his brother to be his best man 18 months out, then I asked my MOH 16 months out along with my brother and my husband's best friend but we waited until 14 months out to ask the rest of the bridesmaids and groomsmen.

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  • K
    Expert November 2019
    Kiley ·
    • Flag

    I am not aware of any etiquette on this. I personally think if you are sure/set on your sister as you MOH then it's okay to ask whenever you want!! Even if that means you are still working on the details/logistics of who will be your BMs.

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    My MOH knew she would be my MOH and I told her that the day I got engaged. I didn't ask my bridesmaids until a few months later.

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  • Lauren
    VIP February 2020
    Lauren ·
    • Flag

    I asked my Matron of Honor & Maid of Honor at the same time and the same way I asked all my bridesmaids. I sent out my proposals to all my girls about a week after the engagement so people didn't have to wait long at all.

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  • J
    Super April 2020
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag

    I think since she is your sister it is totally fine to ask earlier!

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