Engagement party

The first 10 comments will tell you not to throw yourself a party. 🙄🙄🙄 So welcome to WW.

Anyways, I got engaged in 2/23. We're probably skipping it (much to the chagrin of the fiance) and just having a housewarming party in July or August.

That way we can 1) throw the party ourselves 2) have everyone over to our new house 3) push it back a few more months.

On the other hand, my future sibling in laws were engaged for a year and a half before they had an engagement party and they had their engagement party a year before their wedding.

I'd say to just do what you want. If you haven't seen some of your friends since you've gotten engaged, they want to see you, so have an engagement party. But if life is going super fast, just skip it.

Date twin! We want to throw our own party, too. I am now inviting all of the Emily Post types on here to explain to me why this is poor etiquette. My FH and I have been together for 2 years, but my family has only met him once. We met and lived in DC until January when we moved to Charlotte. They all live in NJ/PA. His people are from AL and won't come. We're older (36 and 43) and feel like we should pay our own way/don't need to rely on others to have a party. We think sometime this summer is appropriate and we are having a meet the groom/your presence is present enough barbecue. Super low key chill. BTW, my 85 y/o grandmother thinks it's too much to have an engagement party, bachelorette, shower and wedding. I'm not having a bachelorette and I think if there's no expectation for gifts and it's casual, it's more of a social gathering and it's fine, especially because they don't know my FH. Plus, grandma is old and grumpy, though I love her.

Life is too short to not celebrate things whenever you can! Yes, PP is right, people will tell you it's rude and poor etiquette. People that love you are excited for you and will want to celebrate with you and not care who is throwing it. We had ours 4 months after getting engaged. You're fine if you wait until Aug or Sept.

We skipped an engagement party as we got engaged a few weeks before Christmas and really didn't want to fuss with any additional parties (FH isn't a party kind of guy). The issue with putting off an engagement party is the longer you're engaged the less interest people have in your engagement. I personally have never been to an engagement party and the only couple I knew who had one were both high profile in our small town (i.e political affiliations) and it was thrown for them by their parents within a couple weeks of the initial engagement. I honestly think engagement parties are going to vanish eventually. If y'all want to host one then I wouldn't put it off too long, maybe combine your daughter's birthday party and engagement party? You would have friends and family there anyway and can make it more casual of an event.

I don't think it's wrong to throw your own engagement party as long as you don't register for gifts. It's a great way for families and friends to meet.

Hi Darylese!

Congratulations on your engagement!

This is completely up to you and your FS! Plan it whenever you feel you will have the time. August or September sound like good options after you have your daughter's first birthday. If you would rather skip the party all together, you can totally do that also!

Many couples plan their engagement party within a few months of the proposal. The party is viewed as a kick off to your wedding festivities, so somewhere between just engaged life and the start of serious wedding planning is typically when they are held.

Have you and your FS started much wedding planning yet? Or have you been taking some time to enjoy engaged life?

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Hi Cheryl!

It’s totally ok to plan your own engagement party An engagement party is traditionally hosted by the parents of the bride, the groom’s parents, close friends of the couple, or other family members, however, many newlyweds-to-be plan it themselves!

A low key chill BBQ sounds like a wonderful way for your family to meet your FH and get to know him. I’m sure y’all will have a blast!

I think engagement parties are less controlled by etiquette than many other aspects of weddings. My FBIL and his fiancée got engaged in August and just had their engagement party in April. They went all out: DJ, printed seating chart, professional photographer, etc. It was a small reception. My mom "hosted" an engagement party for us almost 5 months after we got engaged. Her house is tiny, so any entertaining has to be outside when the weather is nice. We broke the WW rules and it was a potluck. We asked that people bring the recipes as any gift they might give. Everyone said it was a great party and that they loved that it was different from the standard engagement party. Maybe they were lying, but I think it's more of the "know your crowd" thing. And now we have the start to a friends' and family recipes cookbook. A week later and I was still getting texts saying what a great party it was.

I think if you don't have the reception type party, there is no reason for you to not host it yourselves. Especially if you have a more low-key, casual event and tell people their presence is their present, you're fine. It's not a gift grab. It's a celebration. And waiting until August or September is reasonable, though I wouldn't wait much past then.

Thanks everyone for the advice!