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Beginner May 2021

Engagement Party during Covid

on August 20, 2020 at 10:38 AM Posted in Planning 0 7

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Thank you for reading this!

I’m getting married in May 2021. I’ve been dying to try and set a date for our engagement party. My fiancé I are hosting our own party at a local brewery (it has food vendors and an outdoor patio). The brewery just opened back up after being shut down from all the ever-changing Covid restrictions. We wanted to do a brunch time engagement party so we wouldn’t have to share the brewery with other customers during open business hours, but it’s wayyyy too hot right now. So we we’ve set a tentative date in October (right before holiday season) in hopes the weather will be a lot cooler. Around 25 people would be invited. I’ve mentioned the new date to a few family members...some have expressed to me that they do not feel comfortable attending a party yet, even though it will be outdoors, social distance, etc.
My fiancé and I have both been working full time during all of this craziness, so we’ve had to get over being fearful and just live our lives. I respect whatever my guests feel about it but, we don’t want to schedule our engagement party in January with it being so close to our wedding. I feel like people are going to be hesitant and fearful for a long time, even when this pandemic is all over. So my thoughts are to have the party and whoever feels comfortable to attend, can attend. But my conflicting thoughts are to hold off for January, and that would be 4 months before the wedding. Confused. Maybe I’m overthinking this.
Thoughts?

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7 Comments

Master October 2020
Margaret · on August 20, 2020 at 10:43 AM
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Personally I would attend, but completely understand why everyone is hesitant. I honestly wouldn't plan anything before elections. Call me a conspiracy theorist, but I truly believe things will "magically" get better.
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Beginner May 2021
· on August 20, 2020 at 10:52 AM
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I agree. I have high hopes it will be better after the election.
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Master October 2020
Margaret · on August 20, 2020 at 10:54 AM
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And you know, there is nothing wrong with doing it just before the Holidays go into full swing or just after the new year to start things "fresh"
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January 1895
Jessa · on August 20, 2020 at 11:00 AM
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I recently went to a wedding shower and it was honestly a waste of money for the hosts. There was no mingling allowed by our state rules. People who already live together sat together at tables with masks on until food was served. The restaurant did not allow people to walk around. Only to the bathrooms and back. No pictures were allowed without a full 6 feet social distancing. No speeches allowed and no present opening.
It honestly felt like they took a few thousand dollars and threw it in the trash. The bride (who has a job that requires lots of contact with people) was sat at a table with the few people who felt okay sitting with her. She wanted the party and kept trying to walk around and mingle. It made many people uncomfortable. She was standing unmasked behind peoples chairs and the manager of the restaurant had to tell her to sit down. It was awkward. She and her mother tried to pressure people into taking pictures without masks standing right next to each other....which again made some people feel uncomfortable and got them in trouble with the venue.
I did hear that she and about 15 people went back to her house so that she could actually "enjoy" herself. And, both her and her mother were making comments on how ridiculous some people were being. That both she and her fiance that have public service jobs were in contact with hundreds of people since covid-19 began and so they are more aware of what needs to be done then the guests. We are seriously re-thinking attending her wedding because she clearly wants to skirt the rules of our state and expects others to go along with it.
Just one guests perspective of an optional pre wedding party.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on August 20, 2020 at 11:13 AM
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I would honestly hold off til January
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Beginner May 2021
· on August 20, 2020 at 11:45 AM
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Hi Jessa
Yikes!!! Thank you for sharing your story and perspective. The vibe, level of comfort, and mingling is different in my state. A lot of people are seen in outdoor dining. The brewery we’re having it at, it’s very laid back. A lot of people are out. But the awkward picture taking and making comments....yikes. I don’t in any way want to come off insensitive or put anyone down for how they feel about all of this. And I definitely want to be able to take photos and have speeches and hug my loved ones. Maybe it is best to wait.
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Beginner May 2021
· on August 20, 2020 at 11:46 AM
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The like the idea of starting “fresh” 😂
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