Engagement Parties- no need?

No one threw one for FH and I and I'm totally fine with that. One less thing to worry about!

Yea, I agree. My MOH offered and I told her not to worry about it, unless she really wanted to. Having a party to celebrate an engagement is weird to me...like isn't that what the wedding reception is too basically?

Some people just want parties. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. FH and I didn't have an engagement party. We didn't miss it, but some people might. TBH I had never heard of one except for in movies until wedding wire

We haven't had one and I'm ok with it. The people that would host one for us will be invited to the wedding so it seems like double dipping in terms of gift giving (engagement gift, wedding gift). Add to that a bridal shower and now I've just triple dipped. I'm a no...unless there are no gifts involved.

My family actually looks at them as tacky. I'm not saying that's my view. I personally don't think they are tacky, but just unnecessary. But according to my family, you are already asking for quite a lot of gifts between a shower and wedding, they think it's rude to hit up the same people for a 3rd gift.

But those same family members that said it's tacky to hit up people for a 3rd gift, gave me a gift when I got engaged anyway? haha. So honestly, I think it comes down to that people don't like being told that they have to give. People will be generous because they want to be generous.

Nah.. We didn't have one or want one.

I didn't have one or want one...seems like a waste of money. You already hosting people at your wedding should someone else have to host then before as well?

I didn't have one. Didn't really have time, it seemed like a waste of money, and TBH they feel kind of gift grabby to me.

We threw a party right after we got engaged but said no gifts (don't bring anything at all- no food/booze etc) and to just come and hang out with us and meet everyone. It was nice.

My mom threw (spelling?) us an engagement party. She hosted it at her house and made many super tasty apps and served champagne. We just invited our closest and local friends and fam. I know it's agains the rules, but I did ask mom to ask the guests to not bring gifts, the gift thing would be the only reason I would have declined her offer. I don't want my closest family and friends to feel like they have to give us a gift every time we invite them to something, and I didn't want to dissapoint my mom by declining just because I don't want to seem gift grabby.

Anyways, it was really fun to see our friends and family all together, they are so great! And my mom was really happy. Since my step dad past away a year and a half ago it's been hard to keep her spirits up, but the wedding and the events leading up to it help a little.

Pointless and gift grabby

I think they're unnecessary personally. I think a bridal/wedding shower is enough.

We didn't have an engagement party, but when my MOH got married, her mother threw one for her. It was fun! Mostly an excuse for everyone to get together and drink, haha. No one brought her gifts, though. I didn't know you brought gifts to an engagement party until WW.

FH didn't want one so we just combined our engagement 'party' with my sister's small graduation bbq. We had some family members in town for unrelated events, so they just stopped by.

I don't really see the point and it seems more like an excuse to get more gifts.

Nobody threw us one...but then again I didn't even know that engagement parties were a thing!

I've never been to an engagement party, and I didn't want one for us, either. I don't really understand the point. If you already have a wedding, and usually a shower beforehand, why is an additional party necessary? No offense meant towards anyone who has one...I don't have an issue with others doing it, I just don't fully understand the purpose.

We had an "engagement dinner" but that was only because we were living in another state from our close friends/family and a few friends mentioned "we should celebrate your engagement"... So we just went to dinner at a nice Thai (mine and H's favorite cuisine) restaurant with a few close friends and family. We definitely didn't plan it expecting gifts...we got a few cards and nothing else. I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to celebrate your engagement...its a milestone and should be something you only have once! Just because you have a party doesn't mean you're saying "I really don't care about spending time with you, I just want the gifts".

Maybe some people cherish spending time with others ...for a change! And whether its a catered house champagne party with 20-30 people or an intimate dinner with 10-15 people they're both special. Just hate that some people always associate wanting a party with "being gift grabby" ...ugh...

The only type of engagement party I ever heard of before WW is a engagement announcement party and/or dinner. This whole thing where someone host a party for you and guest bring you gifts is new to me.

We didn't have an engagement party in the sense that there were invites, a venue, and gifts. My parents invited people over their house for dinner and had a cake for us after dinner. We didn't want people to get us gifts, so we never mentioned it in the dinner invitation. Some of our guests were like so when is the engagement party? I actually said this is it! I don't think engagement parties are tacky if done nicely nor is it a gift grabbing party. If you can afford to properly host another party on top of a wedding and reception then hey go for it! Typically, the engagement parties I have attended, the party is hosted by the parents to announce their children's engagement. Most people no longer rely on their parents for this so IDK what the etiquette is for hosting. If it's like, hey come over for 2.5 cupcakes per guest and punch at 6:30pm next saturday then yah the couple wants gifts.

I honestly think this is a regional and or cultural thing. Engagements parties are considered the first "presentation" of the couple before the wedding and are intended to show acceptance amongst the families and for both families to meet each other, formally. Also, it's an opportunity for friends and family to congratulate the couple. I do not think gifts are a requirement but a kind gesture. I have never heard of a couple registering for an engagement party because the intention is not to be "showered" in gifts rather it is to be "showered" with good intentions.

It is different from a bridal shower since that is about the bride, an engagement party is about the couple.

ETA: my bad for the spelling errors in this and previous post.