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Just Said Yes November 2021

Employee invites

Richard, on June 16, 2021 at 4:12 PM Posted in Planning 0 11

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Ok, try to follow me here. I am a member of "command staff". In my position I directly supervise 5 employees in two different departments 3 in A and 2 in B. I further supervise 4 additional employees, C, for whom I am not their direct supervisor but for whom I supervise on a daily basis. There are then an additional 20 employees, D, for whom are all directly supervised by C but that also fall under the umbrella of my supervision.

I was not going to invite any from D. I had considered inviting 2 from C but it was suggested for office politics that I invite all 4 ( I supervise them now and as I likely progress in the job, they will too and I will have to rely on them more closely in the future).
I wanted to invite 2 from A, as I like them but there is 1 that I simply do not get along with and we are certainly not friends. However the concern is how that will be perceived and that this person will try to use it against me later, especially if I have to discipline them ("I was targeted", "I'm not liked", etc) I really had not entertained inviting anyone from B.
I am inviting my peers and boss.
So, if you understand that dynamic..... help!!

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11 Comments

Latest activity by Ashlee, on June 19, 2021 at 3:13 PM

VIP January 2019
Maggie · on June 16, 2021 at 4:16 PM
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Do you socialize with any of these people outside of work? That is the general rule for inviting coworkers. If you don't, you won't miss them on the day and none of them will expect to be invited anyway. I know coworkers are different from supervisees, but I would strongly consider not inviting any of them to avoid all of the potential issues this could cause.
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Just Said Yes November 2021
Richard · on June 16, 2021 at 4:19 PM
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I have in the past. The 2 from A, but none of the others and it's not something where we make plans now I feel one of them would be hurt not to be invited. It's hard to to say they are "friends", but some of them I wouldn't mind if they attended.
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VIP September 2020
Willow · on June 16, 2021 at 4:20 PM
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I would not invite anyone who is below you in the chain of command. They could feel obligated to attend and gift. It sounds like bad office politics with the existing dynamic you described.
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VIP October 2022
Samantha · on June 16, 2021 at 4:24 PM
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That’s what I was going to say. Unless you are particularly close - like a mentor relationship.
I have invited some colleagues but we are all peers. I wouldn’t want my staff to feel obligated in any way to give a gift or to go to any effort to attend my wedding.
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Super July 2020
Cool · on June 16, 2021 at 4:50 PM
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Especially as their boss, I wouldn’t invite any of them. None or all in this case.
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Just Said Yes November 2021
Richard · on June 16, 2021 at 5:20 PM
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Thank you for the responses. I suppose it is best not to invite them.
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Champion December 2022
Michelle · on June 16, 2021 at 6:13 PM
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Only invite your boss and coworkers if you regularly socialize with them outside of working hours.
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Super October 2022
AJ · on June 16, 2021 at 6:40 PM
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I wouldn’t invite coworkers unless you socialize and have a relationship with them outside of work.
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Super January 2021
Sharonda · on June 16, 2021 at 6:43 PM
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I initially had the same issue. I supervise 5 people, and also wondered about inviting my boss as well. We get along great, but I'm not necessarily close to them and don't socialize with them outside of work. I was afraid they would have hurt feelings if I did not invite them. In the end, I decided not to invite any of them, and they completely understood. I had been worried for nothing.
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Lady · on June 17, 2021 at 10:12 AM
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Do not invite anyone that you supervise. It creates a very awkward situation around the obligation to attend and buy the boss presents, etc. Also, if you're not inviting everyone there is a huge risk of seeming to "play favorites" and any additional actions that could be seen that way could even land you in HR-land scrutiny.
Unless any of these people are people you'd call regularly to hang out (not just like after work drinks that happen sometimes) then do not invite any of them.
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Super September 2022
Ashlee · on June 19, 2021 at 3:13 PM
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I decided against inviting anyone from my work because I wouldn't want to invite all of them. I work in a smaller office though with roughly 20 employees so it would be a pretty uncomfortable situation if i excluded certain people. I definitely wouldn't even entertain inviting anyone I supervised.
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