Savvy September 2020

Eloping instead of full on Wedding? Long post!

Samantha, on March 20, 2020 at 3:24 PM Posted in Planning 0 5

Hello Brides to be! I am wanting some outside advice as to what to do. My Fiance and I have been contemplating just going and eloping once all this craziness is subdued/ courthouses are open again. Our wedding date is 09/19/20 so we are just under 6 months out at this point. We've been thinking about this as our bridal party members have been having some financial struggles prior to all of this to begin with. Now half of the people in our bridal party or their significant others are out of work and trying to file for unemployment. Unemployment is crazy right now too. We are thinking it may be best for their sake to cancel our wedding as we do not want to put anymore of a burden on anyone involved.

We've been struggling with a couple members of our party as well with communication and some other issues as well. Some of our party just seem like they are't interested in all the festivities or being involved point blank. One of the groomsmen has oddly been distancing himself from my fiance. They weren't super close to begin with but they were friendly and good as far as I know. There hasn't been any type of falling out. He seems like he is going through something but he won't open up to anyone. I mean I could be just speculating but this is my opinion.

On the other hand my Maid of Honor has been amazing so far. She's really on top of everything. She has already ordered the invites for my Bridal Shower, she has the bach weekend planned to a t and paid for, she is just super prepared for everything. I feel bad even considering this since I know she has put a lot of time,money, and effort into things. But I am also worried for her since she is a nurse and she did tell me she is on the floor in the hospital where they are treating some of the cases in my state.

I'm worried because I've seen some reports that they may not even be close to blowing over until August or so. Some reports I've seen have said that the warmer weather is going to make this much worse as it is not a human virus. It started within animals and keeps mutating at this point. I mean I have no idea how accurate any of this but it is something for me to think about.

My guest list has a lot of elderly family on it that would be considered high risk if they were to contract it. I would be devastated if anything happened to any of them. i am worried that someone who unknowingly has it would pass it along at the wedding.

We have already paid part of the dues for our photographer so I am thinking of reaching out to see if he would cover the equivalent time to what we have paid if we were just to elope. If not I suppose we would just cut our losses at that point.

I'm trying to make a decision rather quickly while we can get other refunds for our other expenses such as the venue. I know my girls just ordered their dresses a little bit ago. I know they only have two weeks to return them if need be.

I am disappointed that is coming to this but I'm kinda thinking it may be for the greater good at this point. I do want my special day, but I'm feeling like it's just not worth it at this time We could still do a reception next spring or summer if we do decide to elope. We always said we wanted something simple. I would think by then things will be better.

I'm on the fence ladies. What do you think? I'm open to any advice or thoughts. Thank you in advance!


Latest activity by Courtney, on April 16, 2020 at 9:18 AM
  • Molly
    VIP September 2020
    Molly ·
    • Flag

    I would not elope. In 10 years I think you will look back be very glad you did not cancel and elope. If your bridal party is struggling to pay for things consider making it more casual. I'm not sure what have them paying for but consider not having professional hair and make up. If the dresses are what they can not afford consider amazon. We got beautiful brides maid dresses for $30.

    • Reply
  • Cyndy
    Rockstar May 2019
    Cyndy ·
    • Flag
    This is a very personal decision. If you and your FH feel good about it then go for it and just have a reception with friends and family when this is over.
    • Reply
  • Heather
    Dedicated March 2020
    Heather ·
    • Flag
    It's a personal decision depending on what your values and priorities are. We had to cancel our beach wedding that was going to happen on April 7th.
    At first we were disappointed but then realized that all that mattered to us was being married. Our new plan is to go to a park on Tuesday and get married just us and our sons. No decorations or setting up. Just simply us saying our vows and finally being married. And we're both still so excited about it.
    Thankfully we got refunds so our $10k wedding quickly became a $500 wedding and in an uncertain time this plan feels much better.Good luck with whatever you decide, I'm sure itll be special either way.
    • Reply
  • K
    Dedicated December 2020
    KK77 ·
    • Flag

    This virus is putting things in perspective for me. We had planned a June 2020 wedding and decided 2 days ago to either postpone it until September or do a JP and have big celebration the following year. I was excited that the wedding was coming up, but really thought about having elderly family travel to attend during this time was a big concern for me. Parents, aunt and uncles and a elderly grandmother. I am hopeful that this will run its course sooner rather than later but I know that is not something I can control. My family is very understanding and when it comes down to it, I just want to be married to this guy. Smiley smile You and your FH will find what feels right.!

    • Reply
  • Courtney
    Super September 2019
    Courtney ·
    • Flag
    I would only elope if that’s what would make you and your fiancé happy, regardless of your bridal party members. Since you’re aware they’re in a tough spot as far as stress and finances I would reach out and say you understand if they would like to take a step back. I wouldn’t make a decision on what type of wedding I wanted based on others’ finances but would be understanding that they might have to cut back. Eloping because you and your fiancé want to makes complete sense - I would focus my decision on that.
    • Reply

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