Lately my fiancé and I have been on the rocks and the stress of a wedding hasn’t been helping. We are trying to fix our relationship but with the wedding 6 months away I don’t believe we can do both at the same time. (Both as in fix us and plan a wedding.) I have thought about scaling back but even then I feel the stress creeping in.. thinking about just eloping to save us the stress.. Any ideas or words of advice will be greatly appreciated
Focusing on your relationship is far more important than a big fancy wedding. The wedding is one day, the marriage is forever. If eloping is the best choice to be able to better focus on your relationship, there is no shame in changing your plans. You can always do a big vow renewal in a few years if you still want that big day.
I think if you are on the rocks, I would strongly urge you to postpone your wedding. If the relationship needs to be fixed it is not a good time to marry. Best of luck. I hope it works out.
Sorry you’re going through this. Eloping isn’t the answer. You should seriously consider putting the wedding off and seek counseling. Problems don’t go away because you get married. I wish you happiness- good luck!
A marriage will not fix any issues within the relationship. You're better off postponing the wedding until you have sorted out the issues within your relationship. Maybe seek out premarital counseling?
Working on your relationship should be your main focus. I think the best thing to do is to postpone your wedding and work on getting back to a good place with your fiancé. Eloping/marriage is not a bandaid. There are stresses that come with being married. I would hate to see you elope and the problems continue, and new problems arise, and your marriage end in divorce. Good luck.
I agree with the others. Eloping or getting married is not the answer if you’re having relationship issues. Postpone the wedding and get some counseling right away. Focus on the relationship rather than a wedding or it could end up in disaster later.
The relationship needs to come before wedding. It may seem like the planning is the cause but it could be something else. I would cancel the wedding for now and seek counseling. Once the two of you are good, then you can just run off to Vegas (or wherever) and elope, stress free but you definitely do not want to do that if you are on the rocks. That is just not smart!
If eloping will help, then go for it. We had a big wedding planned and we ended up having to cancel due to a huge financial set back. Still pretty upset but we just booked a venue this time around for an elopement/micro ceremony.
We also pushed back our date from August this year to February next year. We're still looking into possibly having a bigger reception but if it won't financially work out for us, we'll just stick with our ceremony crowd and go out to eat at a nearby restaurant or something. Take all the time you need to make sure you guys get back on track because the only happiness that matters is between the two of you. I wish you both the best of luck.
I agree with everyone to a certain extent. Another option would be to keep the same date but set a boundary of not planning for a bit to give yourselves a break and use that break to work some stuff out and air out the dirty laundry.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with eloping if that is what you both want. But, I agree with the majority that it doesn't make sense to elope as a way to fix your relationship. Marriage is not a solution. And sure, planning a large wedding can be stressful, but relationship problems during planning are not usually isolated; they are a symptom of bigger problems.
Pause the wedding planning and work on your relationship. Then work together to decide what kind of wedding you want (and eloping is just one option).
If the stress/rocky road is coming from wedding planning, then elope. But if the stress is from the wedding planning AND other forces, I'd push off getting married altogether, because even if you elope, that's still a marriage, and then you might feel stuck in a bad situation. Either way, make your relationship the priority. Maybe also sit down and talk about which part of planning is stressful for each of you and try to get on the same page.