Eating and wedding dress shopping

I would find a treatment team ASAP (therapist and dietitian and maybe psychiatrist) and possibly put off dress shopping for a few months. I’ve struggled with an eating disorder for half my life and talking with my therapist before shopping for my dress about the feelings that were coming up around it was very necessary.

Thank you I see my therapist on July 9th I have struggled for it for years and was silent about it for so long . I might do that my fear is looking bloated in the wedding dresses I feel embrassed I struggle with eating like this I am turning 29 this year and I feel should have gotten over this by now it's probably because I have been in denial for so long

View Quoted Comment I’ve been in treatment with people ages 8 to 80 so it’s definitely not something you just get over with age! Definitely talk to your therapist and take things one step at a time. Your recovery is so much more important than a wedding dress in the grand scheme of things.

I am nervous to admit it to therapist. I just think like you said I need treatment . Today was the first day I had regular meals I usually skip meals . My parents are both obese and I am fearful of getting so heavy like them . That makes me feel better I am not the only one dealing with it my fiance gets off work soon and ready to just to tell him how I feel about my fears

View Quoted Comment You’re definitely not the only one! I spent a decade going in and out of treatment centers and it’s still something that can come up in times of stress. I see a therapist every few weeks to make sure I’m doing okay as well. It’s totally normal to have all of these fears, but you’ve made a really important first step!

It's so sad most of my family never and still has no clue . I knew I had it for years but didn't want to admit it . My cousin my dad's niece I think was bulimic as a teen but over came it . I just am glad I don't have to hide it from him anymore. I just worry I won't feel beautiful and attractive in my wedding dress I've never liked the way I looked how my body looked it my mom was always very critical of my weight whether I was thin or lately fat .

You already made the first step by talking to your fiancé about it & writing about it here. First step is always acknowledging you have a problem. So you should be proud of yourself for that!
Eating disorders definitely require therapy with a psychologist or a psychiatrist. Nutrition expert can also help as pp mentioned.
I have a friend who successfully fought ED with therapy, establishing healthy eating habits & support of their family/spouse. So it’s great your FH is so supportive. Establishing realistic expectations for how you should look, eating healthy, exercising & learning how to love & accept yourself are important steps to take.
You can beat this!

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Thank you I felt the urge to purge and just skip meals today it was so hard to cook myself and eat the whole meal I had to push myself. My parents abused me growing up and I was assaulted in my early 20s my fiance realized I used this as a way to control some part of my life. But I just have been anxious mess . I am keep a food journal to just monitor my eating my fear is getting so heavy like my parents

View Quoted Comment ED usually starts out of need to be in control of something in your life, especially when there are such traumatic experiences you went through as a child & young adult. Don’t beat yourself about where you are now, or how long it took you to admit you have a problem & instead focus on steady progress, moving forward. One day at a time!
You’ll definitely benefit from therapy, so start as soon as you can. Try to remove yourself as much as possible from toxic or abusive relationships in your life. Lean on your FH & your closest friends. Join a support group in your area. Exercise is also amazing for relieveing anxiety, depression & adopting healthier relationship with your own body. ED can be detrimental to your health long term, so it’s important to stay focused on making steady, even if small, progress. You can do this!

Yeah I've always wanted control over something latelybi have been walking trails a lot and been accmpany with starving and purging I feel ashamed I some small part of me wished it was still hidden today I didn't exercise much I rested but it is a lot to take in most my friends expect two of them I just told today. The rest of my friends have no idea I have known these women for years most are in my bridal party, I just get anxious in social settings like parties where I have to eat I come from an Asian background so I have to eat a lot but it's just the fear of gaining weight I notice the frequent headaches, tiredness . I want to try to take up yoga

You're not a failure! You've been battling with your own brain and it's never easy to ask for help for something you can't see. I think it's important to emphasize that your fiance, family, and friends want you to be healthy on your wedding day not necessarily thin. Andbe mindful a lot of bridal media is VERY biased about weight and isn't real.
You are human and you are on the journey to health, and you are beautiful.

That's what my fiance said he would rather me be a little fluffy them very thin and not here anymore I just never during my college semesters had a set eating schedule I am in my last few semesters before I graduate with my teaching degree. My female roommate my fiances best friends wife knew I had this she was so kind she is a nursing student and wants to work in women's health . I never eat in front of my roommates very seldom unless it's my fiance or friends but today has been a struggle since admitting I have these issues ,

I've never been through this, but I just wanted to say I'm proud of you. Good luck on getting help and finding a dress! You'll look gorgeous no matter what!

View Quoted Comment Thank you my fiancé is home and I am just telling him how I have been struggling. I am just glad I made dinner and I didn’t want to eat but I pushed myself too. Thank you for the support !