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Anna
Beginner July 2023

Dress Regret! Help!

Anna, on September 20, 2022 at 1:22 AM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 3

I feel pretty embarrassed about this whole wedding dress thing, that I am not sure what to do, and just need some support if any others have experienced this before. Just 2 days ago I bought a wedding dress off the rack at a local bridal store. While the dress was discounted from its original price of $2200 down to $1550, it was still out of my budget. I originally went in with my budget at $500-$1000 as I knew tax and alterations could add another $500. The first dress I tried on I fell in love with and I had a bridal moment with crying and all that stuff, but the dress was $1550. I tried on a few more and told myself I would sleep on it before making a choice, and I would talk to my mother who was helping me pay for it (my mother was not there). Well after trying it on a second time, I was super impulsive and said "yes to the dress" and bought the dress way out of my budget without talking to anyone right in that moment. While sometimes going a little above budget is okay, I told myself I would exhaust all options before going above $1000. We don't even have a wedding date set yet, so I had plenty of time. The main problem is I am not sure it is even the right dress for me and if we don't get married for another year or so, my style could change. I always dreamed of having sparkle in my dress. This dress has no sparkle and I thought I could add it, but now realizing how much that costs, that is not an option. Returns and exchanges are not an option either. But most of all, I feel like the dress reminds me of how I did not honor my financial boundaries and acted on impulse, as well as not talk to my fiance and mother first before making the choice. I am feeling very guilty and anxious. What is the best next course of action?

3 Comments

Latest activity by Anna, on September 20, 2022 at 2:43 PM
  • Bailey
    Expert October 2023
    Bailey ·
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    I think you are greatly overreacting: "I feel like the dress reminds me of how I did not honor my financial boundaries and acted on impulse". It's just a dress, love! Many, MANY brides go over on their allotted budget, and all this means is you will need to shave a little here and there from other areas of the budget.

    I say this on every single dress regret post, because it's true: we are conditioned to think there is ONE dress out there that will make us crumble, the dress! But in reality, there are dozens, if not hundreds of dresses you could try on that you would die for. I always pictured myself in a deep cut, flowy satin dress and I bought a stretchy, sparkly, fitted dress. Often times what you thought you wanted most isn't actually what your real dress is like, and that's okay. You didn't violate your wishes or dreams, you made a purchase you probably shouldn't have [financially speaking] but, it's over and done with and you can't walk it back. You love the dress, and that's what matters here.

    You can try and sell it, but you will likely get less than what you paid. So if you're not willing to eat the cost, realize that you impulse bought this dress because of the way it made you feel. It's gorgeous, it makes you feel amazing, etc. If you keep looking, you WILL find more dresses you love and increase your dress guilt, so I'd recommend stopping that immediately.

    If I was you, I would stash it away and not look at the pictures [pictures often don't do it justice right]. Wait until you're 8 months or less out from your wedding and try it on, get it altered, and see how you feel about it. If you hate it, find a new dress and eat the cost.

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  • Paige
    VIP October 2022
    Paige ·
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    If you don't have a date yet and are worrying about possibly not getting married for over a year, then that's PLENTY of time to recoup the extra $550 in other areas (less eating out, buy in bulk, spend a night in rather than going out to an event, rearrange other areas of your wedding budget, etc.).

    As to your style changing, while that could happen, it would be a hard sell to top a dress that made you cry in it. By the time I wear my dress down the aisle, I'll have had it for over 2 and a half years, and my style didn't change. I actually had a moment of doubt when I hadn't seen my dress in like a year and a half at one point, and a lot of the pictures on models were either different colors than my dress or emphasized areas that I'd had changed, but when I saw a video of the dress in the color I'd ordered and everything, it completely put me at ease. I'm about a month away from the big day, and I am so excited to wear my dress!

    A lot of this sounds like buyer's remorse, which it totally normal, but don't let it get in your head and talk you out of a dress that you really love Smiley heart

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  • Anna
    Beginner July 2023
    Anna ·
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    Thank you guys for the support and feedback! I think it is a great idea to put it away and wait before making any big choices. I could very well be overreacting and just need time to let it sink in that I am off the dress market for now (or maybe ever) and that's okay! It is also helpful to hear that other brides have gone over budget too.

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