Dream Wedding or not so dreamy?

I’m so over budget it’s not even funny anymore. I’m 3 weeks out and everything was going perfect until about s month ago when we got our final numbers and ended up needing a bigger tent and added tent flooring which brought our rentals from $4,000 to $13,000😳 but FH and I are both such detail oriented people that we aren’t willing to let a budget slow us down lol.

View Quoted Comment Lol OMG 4K to 13K??!!! Lol I don’t feel as bad about going over now, It only happens once right? 😉

Going over budget is such a normal thing to do. I remember I originally said 12k and then we went up to 15k as our budget but ultimately I went a bit over to 16.2k
I definitely don't regret going over budget because it wasn't too much more but I also feel like in hindsight even if I didn't have any of these added extras.. it would have still been a perfectly beautiful day. In hindsight it's easier to feel like simpler planning would have been perfectly ok too. I think during the planning we tend to think we want this and that and then it adds up but if we didn't have any of that and all we literally had was the dinner and nothing else like decor or photobooth or party favors it woulda been totally fine because people are there to celebrate you. We as hosts just think all these extras would be nice.

View Quoted Comment Lol YES that happened. I think I blacked out when I received the updated quote. Honestly, I’m on of those people that if my wedding isn’t a huge hit, it will haunt me until I am in my coffin and maybe even after🤦🏾‍♀️ It’s worth it!

View Quoted Comment That’s our budget, 12K but it’s looking more like your final price and that doesn’t include honeymoon lol or moving costs! Thanks for your input! You made me feel better lol

View Quoted Comment 😂😂😂 me too! Thank you!!

We started with a budget of 8k for a small intimate wedding. That was supposed to include everything. Well....the venue alone is 10k. Oops!

We are over Budget but I would not change it for anything. We simply looked at our budget and made sure that we could still do it with what we were saving and went from there. We would not have gone over if it had to be on credit.

View Quoted Comment Yes! I refuse to credit anything! Thanks for your input!

View Quoted Comment Lol who knew weddings were so expensive 🤷🏾‍♀️

We never set an official budget to begin (biggest wedding no-no) but estimated we would spend around $15k. It became obvious pretty quickly that that wasn’t realistic for what we wanted. We have no regrets at all so far in planning, and I can’t imagine that we’ll look back on our wedding day and think “wow I wish we hadn’t done that.” If we were taking out loans or using credit cards and putting ourselves in debt, I could definitely see it being an issue, but we’re busting our butts to make sure that we have the wedding we want and I think it’s going to be extremely rewarding seeing all of our hard work come together. If you reevaluate your budget and decide that you can spend a little more by saving in other areas of your life, I don’t think you’ll regret it for a second. If you’ll have to go into debt for it, I would stick with something more budget friendly and perhaps go for a more extravagant vow renewal later on.

The real question is what you give up for that dream wedding. If the extra $3K just means you don't go on that vacation you planned for this year, you'll likely not regret it. If it means you can't replace that car that keeps breaking down, or never have a chance to buy a house, or can't go back to school for your dream career, or have to wait longer to have kids, you may well regret it. We can't tell you whether it's worth it or not without knowing more about your financial situation and your other priorities.

And don't forget that the less you spend on a wedding, the less likely you are to get divorced. Reducing your chances of divorce has obviously got to be a higher priority than having a dream wedding.

Our budget for a small DW and separate local reception was $18K... we spent about $28K. 😳 But because our original budget was well within our means, we underestimated costs, chose upgrades, and got a cash gift from my mom, we were ok going way over-budget. Looking back? All our upgrades were totally worth it. But that’s because we paid off the extra amount quickly, already own a house, and are older with no kids in our future.

View Quoted Comment Well said!

If you can afford your dream wedding without going in debt, then I think it is worth it!

We actually extended our engagement so that we could afford the wedding we wanted. My FH has been married before, so he didn't really care. He said he'd go to the courthouse with me today and get married. But I've never been married, and I'm one of those females who've been dreaming of my wedding since I was a girl! So FH wanted me to have everything I wanted. Once I started researching, and thinking about what I actually wanted, I realized that some things just aren't that important. Like favors, programs, etc. We realized that the date we first picked (Aug. 2019) was too soon. It wouldn't give us enough time to save for the things that were really important to us. So, we reworked the budget, prioritized everything (so important!!) and then came up with a timeline for paying for it all. Basically how much can we save each month, multiplied by the number of months we have to save. So, we pushed out date out to May 2020, because that gave us more time to save. The date actually was nicer too, as it will be our 3 year dating anniversary.

Can you, or are you willing to, push your date out to give yourselves more time to save for what you want? I'm a big believer in getting what you want, not settling if you don't have to. For us, we could have settled for less, but since I plan on this being my only wedding in my life, I want what I want. It was worth it to us to wait a bit longer. Now I'm getting my dream wedding!!

This wedding is yours. It is a celebration for the two of you. You deserve to have something that you love and remember as a treat to yourselves. That said, I totally understand the issues of budgeting. After my partner and I looked around and got some quotes, it was clear that we would have to make cuts or figure out something else. Sometimes what we found as an alternative was better (and cheaper) than what we had originally wanted. We have also been putting in a lot of grunt work to make a bunch of things ourselves and doing tons and tons of price comparisons across various companies. This, however, requires the luxury of energy and time. If you're willing to put the time in, you can make what you want instead of buying it for far less $$$. If you're not crafty, check out pinterest. Some of the ideas there are amazing (until you find yourself falling down the rabbit hole)! This event should be special. I don't think you need to settle. Compromise, yes, settle, uh uh.