Don't want to be a bride anymore or have a wedding!

In my moms dress makes me mad. I just don't know what to do at this point. I wish we could cancel the big church wedding and go to the JOP. I don't know why I let my mom push me into all this. It isn't what I want and I'm so overwhelmed.

My dad is a pastor (he's marrying us) and my mom wants all this remodeling done in the church before the wedding. So over the whole summer while my FH has been working and now while he has a little time off between jobs when we should be finishing wedding stuff and moving my mom has him helping my dad remodeling. FH sees the controlling aspect but he's trying to be respectful and not cause hurt feelings (we were both so happy when he got this new job to move away from my family).

I'm the one who posted about us interviewing and my mom threw a crying fit. I feel like this wedding is for her and not me and I'm doc overwhelmed with everything going on and dealing with all the stress. I don't know why I haven't stood up and I'm mad at myself.

Sorry to make this so long. I never wanted a huge wedding. I wanted something simple and beautiful with a very few people. I felt obligated to get married in my dad's church because of my family when I would have rather gotten married in a smaller church out in the country. I don't know what to do or how to make it through this wedding.

Definitely not that overwhelmed but as it's gotten closer I totally feel you. It's a bummer it has been an exciting time but at this point I'd stand up and tell your family that it's your day with your FH and that you appreciate help but not opinions and try to enjoy your day. It sounds like you've put a heck of a lot of work into it. It would be sad to see it go to waste.

As long as you're still excited to get married to your groom everything will be ok. Look at all of the stuff you have left and decide what you can live without. Then do that. Involve your family as little as you can these next couple of weeks. And keep your eyes on the prize! You're moving away. It may seem impossible now but you've been strong enough to make it this far and you'll get through it. After you move take a couple of months to spend time with your new husband and relax. 5, 10, hell even a year from now you'll look back and know what you're capable of. You can do it girl!! Hang in there!

OP, you certainly do have too much on your plate. Can you see if there is anything you can say 'no' to, little things you can delegate, postpone the move a bit or hire a mover, etc.

I agree with Kate....definitely take some time for yourself. I'm going thru some wedding stresses right now; but I think mine's just normal stuff.

Wow. I'm very sorry! I know how you feel with the mom stuff. I had to battle that for a long time. I would just stop doing wedding stuff and show up. If your that close, and didn't want a big wedding anyways, anything that's left to do can probably be left undone. Just let it go and get to the wedding.

I really have no advice for you other than just forget about everyone else and stay away from them and to leave you out of the drama. This is why I don't want my family involved in the process at all and why they're only gonna find out when they get their invites. Honestly it's not their wedding it's yours and they should have no say in it period. Just be blunt and tell everyone to fuck off.

I have no advice just know that your not alone

Thank you ladies.

Don't give up. You're almost at the end !!! It's literally next Saturday. Do. Not. Give. Up. <3

This is about you and FH getting married. It's not about a wedding. Suit up and show up, then make your move and start your new life together as husband and wife. Simplify everything from now until then. Keep your distance from family, stay focused on what matters to you. Wishing you all the best!

You can do it. Always keep in mind you're stronger than you think. Just remember you get to marry your FH and thats the most important part of this whole process. Prayers fellow bride

I felt compelled to post on this because I had a really similar situation. My DH was offered an amazing job in another city 7 months before the wedding (but we (including my mother) had known it was a possibility for almost 2 years, because he interned there). When he was officially offered the job, I started looking for jobs in the new city (which is only 1.5 hrs away from my hometown/family). My mom lost it. It was terrible. We had a huge fight and didn't talk for four days (which is a really long time for us). We finally mended things, but she became really controlling about the wedding (I think maybe because it was like one thing she could control? I don't know-she started having a lot of other issues because then my dad's job transferred him so THEY moved. Good thing I didn't stay in my hometown, huh, cuz we're actually closer to where they live now than if we had stayed in hometown). Anyways I was basically dreading the wedding because of all the stress and change and my mom but then somehow it ended up being a perfect day. My mom and i's relationship has actually gotten a lot better now that wedding planner is over and not living in the same city is actually healthier for us I think, in hoping it will work out that way for you too- I just wanted to tell you that story to hopefully encourage you that everything can work out! I am thinking of you and I know your wedding will still be awesome- just try to push aside all the sh!t and enjoy the best part of the day- marrying your FH!!!n

ETA- spelling issues in this and I'm too tired to fix. Been a long day at work y'all lol.

I think you need a very big glass of wine

@junebride, thanks so much for sharing! I appreciate it

YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I feel the exact same way. This is why it was really important to me that we take an immediate honeymoon. It allows me to still be excited for something. I just keep telling myself it will all be over soon and then we can start our lives together. The little things make me happy. I bought a pine scented candle the other day and smelling it made me think that in a couple months FH and I will be celebrating our first Christmas together as husband and wife and I'm incredibly excited for things like that.

Sorry you're feeling this way! I get being stressed out but I'd never want to call it complete quits.. especially this close to the big day!

Ultimately a marriage isn't about the big party, it's about you and your FH. Focus on that. What the end goal is after the big wedding.. you and him spending forever together.

You've put a lot of time, money and honestly probably a majority of your sanity into this day. Try to relax and enjoy it, you're almost there!

I HEAR YOU! I told FH this morning I'm over it and ready to say screw it and just look at moving instead of worrying about a wedding.