Just Said Yes July 2021

Don't want anyone to walk me down the aisle

Ashley, on June 2, 2020 at 12:57 AM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 1 14

I do not want anyone walking me down the aisle. The thought of it to me is always really awkward and cringey. Both my parents have always been in my life and albeit we haven't always seen eye to eye but my parents are together and married and have been for like 25 years. Lately, they don't even seem excited to even talk about my wedding at all (Getting married 7/31/21). And myself and FH are paying for the wedding ourselves, we aren't asking anyone for anything if anyone offers, its another story, but we aren't asking for anything. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings or offend anyone or piss anyone off but with my family, it's more than likely going to happen. I don't want to be walked down the aisle, but I did include my parents to walk together down the aisle as well as my FH parents. We included both sides of the family for walking down the aisle so nobody feels left out. My brother and my FH siblings (He's a triplet) are all in the wedding and I have a place for all the parents to walk in.

Is it okay to say I don't want anyone to walk me down the aisle or do the father/daughter dance really. My family is not a hug/physical contact type of family. I couldn't tell you the last time I hugged anyone in my immediate family in the last 4 years.


Latest activity by Brandyn, on June 28, 2020 at 2:43 AM
  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag
    That's totally fine, but I'm sure your family will question why you don't want to. I would be prepared for some backlash from your parents, but ultimately it is your wedding so do what you want.
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    It’s totally fine. I’m walking down the aisle alone. My parents are walking in together and FH parents walking in together. FH will also walk in alone because we selected not to have a bridal party.
    • Reply
  • Hillary
    Expert October 2021
    Hillary ·
    • Flag
    It’s totally fine to walk down by yourself. I am super close with my family but I’m walking down alone. It’s cringey to me too....I’m 31, I don’t need my father(or mother) to “give me away”. My parents and my husbands parents and stepparents will all walk down the aisle though. As for the father/daughter dance...I didn’t really want to do that either. We’re close but my mom has always been the more affectionate one so dancing with my dad feels weird to me. BUT, I got away with not doing one at my Bat Mitzvah so I feel like I should now.
    • Reply
  • Rebecca
    Master August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    Walking down by yourself is very common, now. And it is completely your decision.

    Don't let anyone guilt or bully you into changing what you want. If they push, simply say the decision is made, and change the subject.

    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    Walk yourself down the aisle . Do not say the thought of being escorted makes you cringe. Do say that having grown up to be a capable and independent woman, you are are walking by yourself to the altar to meet your groom, just as he will go there with no escort to meet you . It is a statement about your self sufficiency to step away from the family who raised you to start a new family with FI. Proudly, on your own now. The job of the parent is to raise each child to be a good person, teach them well, so that they are independent functioning productive members of society, and they accomplished that. Present it positively. They should be proud.
    • Reply
  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth ·
    • Flag

    This is totally up to you! If you want to walk alone, that's fine! I'd present it to them with an open mind and be understanding if they initially don't get it, but I'm sure they'll come around eventually.

    • Reply
  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    You don't need anyone to walk you down the aisle. I was planning to walk myself down the aisle. I don't love the concept of being "given away" like a possession.

    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    Totally fine! My hubby & I walked together. Do whatever makes you happy.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag

    Absolutely. i didn't have anyone walk me down the aisle either, i think it's not a super uncommon thing anymore.

    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag

    You are a strong woman who is totally capable of walking down the aisle alone! Go for it! It is your day, so do what you feel is best! Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    This exactly. And also remember that even if someone gets upset, that doesn't mean your decision is wrong. They can deal with their feelings and you deal with yours.

    • Reply
  • Kayla
    Beginner November 2019
    Kayla ·
    • Flag

    I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I am not having anyone walk me down either. I agree it would be cringy for me as well. I am not close to my dad, but he has always been there, but I lived with my mom most of my life. Both of them will be there and both of them will feel away if I do something with one and not the other. I choose to do nothing lol and focus on it just being me and my husband. We also decided not to do those dance with the parents as well. I think those traditions are great but just not for me. And that is okay.

    • Reply
  • Jana
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
    • Flag
    That's totally fine. While it may have originated as symbolic of transferring property, most people don't view it that way today. You can walk down the aisle yourself and don't have to explain yourself. Whoever is paying or not is moot.

    I'm not close enough to any family to ask them, but I might have a friend's husband walk me down just to keep the pacing right.
    • Reply
  • B
    Beginner May 2020
    Brandyn ·
    • Flag
    Maybe you and your fiancé should walk down together ... switch it up.. I was going to do that but my husband ended up wanting to be surprised , so my brother walked me down. Things are so different now! Make your day unique and special for you both. Traditional is overrated
    • Reply

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