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RoAnn
Just Said Yes March 2023

Does your Dress Color Matter?

RoAnn, on November 26, 2022 at 8:31 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 1 17
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I totally know I can do what what ever my heart desires! However, I want my wedding to be as much of a reflection of us as it can be, while still maintaining some tradition, elegance and class.


I’ve been married before, have kids and I’m getting married in my mid 40’s. His mother already had a sigh about the dresses I showed her I was contemplating, with the question “You’re going to wear white?” I was taken aback but handled it like a pro. Later, I discussed this with my own mother and she agrees with her, saying I’m too old and “not pure.”
And although I can do as I please - what exactly is the norm here in today’s open minded society. It doesn’t help that I’m Roman Catholic and he’s not, and we’re having a church wedding (to atone for my previous sins) - as these things go I don’t want to be the topic of the can you believe she wore white gossip among his enormous female population.
Our colors are black and white (off white/ivory). I guess I’m asking what exactly is the traditional view point here and how would you recommend a happy medium?
Don’t worry my fresh snow pure white dress is still a very HUGE possibility- partially because I’m the black sheep like that. But at 45 is that practical or necessary? Or I can go bold and get wear Red!

17 Comments

Latest activity by Chiara, on February 6, 2023 at 7:19 AM
  • Bird
    Super June 2021
    Bird ·
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    If you want to wear white/ivory I would certainly wear it. i know lots of people who are in their 20s who were intimate with their partners or lived with their partners before they got married and they all wore white. I also think red would be lovely too! My grandma wore a black dress on her wedding day, because they just went to the courthouse. Sorry I couldn’t be of more help. Good luck in whatever you decide!!!
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  • M
    Expert July 2023
    Michele ·
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    The concept of being a virgin or pure before marriage is man's way to control women. Nowhere in anybody's Bible does it speak about a white wedding gown equating to a woman who is worthy of marriage. America's view on white dresses has significantly changed. Your mother, like mine, is steeped in her era. If possible have the wedding you dream of. People will always talk regardless to what you do or don't do. Whats in your heart to do is what you are here to do. Enjoy your wedding on your terms and live with no regrets. By the way, I'm a Catholic school graduate who once thought I'd become a Nun. Love and Light
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  • Shannon
    Super July 2022
    Shannon ·
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    Wear white if you want. It’s not a pure thing anymore.
    Tell moms and guests less info so they do not inject their negative opinions.
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  • D
    Dedicated October 2018
    Deb ·
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    I got married the second time at 42. I wore a white dress and felt wonderful. It was the dress I fell in love with. Be happy and do what you want!

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  • Kristen
    Expert February 2023
    Kristen ·
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    I’m 44 and this will not be my first marriage. I’m not wearing white only bc white is not my color. I’m wearing a very pale blush, but looks a little more ivory. Wear what you like. Some people are very hard core when it comes to beliefs, even if they are outdated. I say let them talk lolDoes your Dress Color Matter? 1

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  • Caryn
    Rockstar November 2023
    Caryn ·
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    The "pure" thing really icks me out. I have no time for anyone who is speculating about the status of the bride's hymen. I will be 49 when I get married for the second time (2 teenage kids). I am wearing ivory because it suits my skin tone better than snow white, not because I have been "spoiled". No one at your wedding cares other than your mother and MIL, who should mind their own business.

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    A white wedding dress has nothing at all to do with purity/virginity. It was introduced during the late 1800s by Queen Victoria as a symbol of wealth because only the wealthy could afford a dress that would be worn one time. It was only during the early to mid 1900s that the wealth symbolism was replaced by purity as a way to control the population’s beliefs. Even through history, especially in Catholic communities, blue has always symbolized purity.


    Wear whatever color you want and ignore the naysayers. Negative people don’t like anything so don’t give them the power they want.
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  • Mrs.evans
    VIP October 2022
    Mrs.evans ·
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    Hi RoAnn Congratulations to find new love and about to start a new journey with your new husband and family. Now I just gotten married 3weeks ago. And I had turn 50 before I gotten married and we both have children 1 together. And I worn white my sister had a issue about it and said the same thing to me. But I paid her or anyone else any attention now I have never been neither of us have been married. So I worn white and no one else had a problem with it they all sai thT I was beautiful. And so did he ❤❤ so I did get a white sweetheart neckline and mermaid silhouette with corset back. And we also gotten married in a church.Wear what makes you feel beautiful SAY YES TO YOUR DRESS
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  • RoAnn
    Just Said Yes March 2023
    RoAnn ·
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    It’s absolutely a beautiful dress! Thank you and congratulations!
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  • RoAnn
    Just Said Yes March 2023
    RoAnn ·
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    Congratulations Monique! Thank you. I do believe I was in my overthinking mode letting everyone and everything give me pause, but that’s all it was… pause. I plan on wearing what I pick no holding back. I love that you and everyone else who commented came out for me to remind me I’m the one saying YES to MY DRESS!


    Thanks again
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  • Paige
    VIP October 2022
    Paige ·
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    If you want to wear stark white, go for it. If you want to wear red, go for it. People who get themselves in a twist over an outdated "tradition" can deal with their issues themselves. If you do want to try to find a happy medium, you could try ivory, blush, mocha, champagne, silver, or a color that's close to white.

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  • E
    Devoted February 2023
    Elycia ·
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    Very few people actually wait unitl marriage for intimacy anymore and almost all brides wear white/ivory still. Dont pay attention to the old fashioned family members. If you like a dress and it's white wear it.

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  • Orianna
    Devoted December 2022
    Orianna ·
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    I cannot stress this enough:

    Wear. What. Makes. You. Happy.

    I'm 36, I get married in 12 days. I had another fitting yesterday of my gown, its got an "antique white" underlay, and then is completely covered in black lace and a black overlay to create a smokey look. And whenever someone who doesn't know me super well finds out that I'm wearing a black wedding gown all I do is look down at my clothing (which is almost always all black) and just smile and go "yup!"

    You should still look like you on your wedding day. Still feel like you. Just heightened. Don't let anyone dictate that to you.

    Let your wedding be about celebrating you and your partner. Everyone else can kick rocks!

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  • RoAnn
    Just Said Yes March 2023
    RoAnn ·
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    That dress sounds so amazing!
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  • C
    Savvy October 2023
    Courtney ·
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    Wear whatever you want! From my experience it's a lot of the older (especially the religious ones) that actually still follow the white = pure tradition. No one else cares. If a white dress makes you happy and you like it, wear it and own it! Its your wedding! No one elses!

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  • Pamela
    Savvy April 2023
    Pamela ·
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    Love this neckline. This dress is beautiful!

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  • T
    Just Said Yes April 2024
    Tenii9 ·
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    Nowadays, very few individuals wait until marriage to have intimacy, although virtually all brides still wear white or ivory. Don't listen to the traditional family members. Wear a white outfit you like if you have the option .

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