Do you invite the officiant to the reception?

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

It is definitely customary to invite the officiant to your reception when you are married in your own church. When you hire someone you don't really know, it's not as clear-cut. It is surely a nice gesture to invite them. However, they will very likely decline unless they have a special relationship with you.

Best wishes,

Margaret Sneddon, Harpist

www.margaretsneddon.com

New York, Westchester, Tri-state area

Yes, it is typical to invite the officiant (and his or her spouse) to the reception. In order to avoid any misunderstandings or awkwardness, make sure you mail him/her an official invite just like your other guests.

I'm inviting my officiant and their spouse to my reception, simply because I work with my officiant and she's doing my ceremony for free! Having them at my receptions still works out to be less than having to pay for an officiant!

We're inviting our officiant as well, but because she works most weekends doing weddings, she doesn't get to spend much time with her family so she told me invites are always nice to receive, but she always declines, so she can get home as quick as possible to be with her family, which I feel is way more important anyway!!

I'm not sure it is customary, but always appreciated! I will be inviting our officiant, even though we don't know her at all..I think it will be appreciated!!

Some couples invite us and some do not. We realize the cost may well be a factor and we are not insulted or upset if not invited. With some of our couples we get along so well they feel like family and when they invite us we try to go. Just make sure if you are inviting your officiant that you actually send an invitation. Don't just mention it at the end of the ceremony that they are welcome to stay because then we don't know if you really want us to come or just had two extra meals to use up. It is embarrassing for everyone.

We're inviting our officant because he was the priest at our nueman center when we were in school and we picked him becuase he knows us both. If we had had to hire a stranger I don't think we would have invited him to the reception.

We had to hire an officiant for our wedding, (we are having our ceremony at our reception site). I invited the officiant. He turned down the invitation but I thought it would be a nice gesture.

I work as an officiant as well as a photographer, and I often get invited. It's nice to be invited and it shows me the couple is happy with me, my personality and my services so far. It shows that I'm not just a guy they want to show up for 20 minutes. However, that being said, I always decline politely and thank them for the offer. I might grab some passed food if I'm waiting for the couple to get free to sign the marriage license, but that's about it.

I'm also inviting mine but only because I work with him and he was already on the guest list. The bonus is he said he'll do my wedding for $100 that alright with me it saves lots of money.

As an officiant, I usually turn down the offer unless I know the couple very well. (or they insist)

I'm an officiant and I agree with Weddingman - I always decline the invitation. Generally, couples will ask me when we meet to discuss their ceremony if I'll be staying for the reception, which gives me the opportunity to politely decline. I always give them the same response - 1. you don't need to be spending more money on another plate or two - after all, you're already paying me for my service; 2. if I said yes to every invite, I'd pack on the pounds very fast; 3. if they insist, I agree to stay for part of the cocktail hour.

I'm a very gregarious guy and can talk to anyone but I always feel that if I stay at a reception someone is going to have to "babysit" me and make sure I'm having a good time. I have a fabulous time performing the ceremony - that's enough for me.

Officiants understand that marriages are expensive; I usually stay for a few minutes after the ceremony to answer any questions, take some photos but NEVER for the reception. We gladly appreciate the invitation however.

It is actually proper etiquette to invite your officiant and their spouse. Sometimes I am invited to the rehearsal dinner as well, which is nice because we connect more deeply with the social interaction, and I am at the rehearsal with everyone else. I do not expect it, but it is in good taste. Of course I am not offended when I am not invited, and am just honored to be a part of their new journey. For me, it is such an important position in the wedding that showing up and taking off feels weird and impersonal, and my clients really matter to me. Do not forget to ask for a photo with your officiant also, as many forget and I have had clients distressed later. So I feel a little silly, but just check to see if that is what they want and if I should stick around for it or not. It is the only opportunity to get one, so if you do want your photo with your officiant, be sure that this photo is listed on the photo list. Some photographers do think of it, while others do not. Up to the clients, but we want to make sure our brides and grooms have the best possible experience.

(I have clients who met me for the first time at the ceremony and we connected so well we stayed in contact, so much so that they keep me abreast of new pregnancies, and so on. I love it!)