Do teenagers count as kids?

Under 18 is generally considered a kid because they're legally not an adult.

Just to clarify, though, you're not "totally responsible for strangers' kids". Parents are responsible for their own children and you're not obligated to provide anything special for them, but you can choose to do so if you'd like.

And yes, if you're inviting all families, teenagers would get included (such as your boss' 17 year-old-daughter). If you want to let your 16-year-old cousin bring a guest you can.

You choose. Pick an age cut off and stick with it.

Whoops, I mean I don't want to hire someone and expect parents to just leave their kids with her. I'd rather have a high school kid just come entertain them than really babysit

Thanks!

I'd say make a cut off of maybe 13. They are old enough at that point.

We didn't want children there. We rented a room put games, snacks, etc. in it with 2 babysitters we hired. We planned for 13 children, got RSVPs for 5, and ended up with 10 in the room for the night. We planned for anyone 12 and up to attend the wedding. They're old enough at that age to behave in an adult manner (sit in their chair, eat grown up food, not run around or stick their fingers in the cake). Teenagers were invited with their family, and not allowed a date. If they were from out of town, they didn't have a date traveling with them, if they were local and "couldn't live without their bf/gf at the time" they could stay home.

It depends. For our venue, we can do a package for under 21- year olds. It helps us because it is a substantial price cut (I know not all places do that, but if you are doing an open bar, you should definitely ask, because you don't want to pay for alcohol for people under 21). Beyond that, it is up to you. We are inviting kids who are at the age that they would remember the event and wouldn't need their parent to watch them really, and not the little little ones beyond my flower girl. We can't do guests for any of the under 21 year olds because of our count, but it would be up to you! I think under 21 or under 18 they would less expect that, so if you let some bring guests, it would probably be a happy surprise.

Also, because we have a range of ages, some of the "kids" don't want to be seen as kids, so we are going to have a basket where the seating cards are that says Kids Only, with cameras and maybe some other stuff for anyone who dubs themselves a kid to enjoy (although, I am sure one of my "adult" brothers will sneak a camera haha), rather than putting different favors or whatever at their spot.

Under 18 are "kids" in name. You can set an age cutoff but you must do it so you don't split families. For example you can't say children 8 and older, and then one family has a 6 year old and a 10 year old and only allow the 10 year old.

Its nice to make childcare available but a lot of parents won't let their kids go off with a babysitter they haven't met/vetted themselves.

Stephanie, I agree. I don't have kids but I probably wouldn't leave them with a stranger either. That's why I'm leaning towards having someone around just in case and just pleasing everybody. That's one less argument to have with relatives.

Alcohol prices won't be an issue since we are doing a do-it-yourself kind of bar. I guess parents have to be responsible for not letting their teens drink (maybe with help from my mom and MOH).

The reason I'm so invested in this is that FH and I have been together since high school. I remember when we had to go to formal events without a date it was really just miserable to hang out with the 10-year-olds. And it drove me nuts when I was 17 going solo and my cousin was 21 and brought his flavor of the week. I'm just trying to give people the respect my bratty high-school self wanted

For me, I'm considering a "kid" anyone under 13, but honestly maturity is also a factor. If there was a 13 year old that would be a pain the whole wedding I may have changed my reasoning. Luckily all of my friends kids are young enough to be safely in the kid zone with no protest, the only kid exception is my cousin who I think will only be 12 but is very mature for her age so I want her to be there.

I considered a "kid" anyone who was invited with their parents (same household). My oldest kid was 15, so it wasn't too difficult. Of course, we got to pay a lower rate for everyone under 21 since they weren't included in the alcohol numbers.

Be careful with DIY alcohol. Lots of liability in that!

@Stephanie, we were thinking just beer and wine so I thought a bartender would be a waste of money to pour drinks, but does everybody think it's worth it to pay somebody just to be "in charge" of drinks for safety?

Absolutely hire someone to be in charge of the drinks. Not only do you not want the liability of making sure nobody underage is serving themselves or anyone driving away drunk, but tending bar is a lot of work - making sure ice bucket is full, cups are stocked, things like that.

No. YOu do NOT do 'pour it yourself' bars. You will use way more liquor, the liability is insane, and it will be a mess the entire time. And if you do end up inviting teenagers? Good luck with the, "their parents will watch them" concept. I can tell you, from years in the biz, that this will not happen

Why would you invite your boss' daughter? Or, for that matter, any teenager you don't know personally and want as a guest? I know you're trying to be polite, but seriously, this is how guests lists get out of control, and you end up staring at a sea of people you hardly know.

Ahh thank you Celia, that's what I was waiting to hear! I do not want boss's daughter, but based on everyone acting like teens are the same as children, I felt like I had to.

As for the liquor, what if we do canned craft beers and bottles of wine only? FH's friend owns a local bar and talked about providing the beer. I'm okay with the cost of a bartending; it just hadn't really dawned on me as necessary but that does make sense!