Do people really wear black tie when requested?

Yes, at the black tie weddings we’ve attended men have been in tuxes and women have been in gowns. I’ll say that they’ve also been the best events we’ve ever been too- multiple courses for the meal, too shelf open bar all night, a great band, etc. So as long as you’re actually hosting a black tie event, people will mostly follow the dress code.

Yes, if you are hosting an actual black tie event, people will show up in black tie attire. This means start time is 6 pm or later. Dinner is a seated, multi-course meal of elevated dishes. Decor is fancy, elegant and classic (ie, no rustic, boho chic, themes, etc.). Bar is top shelf (and of course free to guests all evening, from cocktail hour to the end of the event). Guest favors tend to be nicer/pricier than those at a non-black tie event. Entertainment typically consists of a live band, and a FH later in the night or at the after party. You should also choose invitations printed on high quality paper, as they set the tone for the type of event you are hosting.

We always follow the dress code, if an event (be it a wedding or some other event) is black tie; however, I agree with both Cece and Sarah. If you aren't hosting at a black tie level, then you should not be specifying black tie. To add to what they've already stated is necessary, you'll also need to have valet parking and generally your cocktail hour should have a variety of high end passed appetizers in addition to your multi-course, high end, plated dinner.

View Quoted Comment Yes, it is a true black tie event with all the specifications you listed - just hoping everyone shows up dressed to impress!

View Quoted Comment And if they don’t, I promise, if you are focused on the right things, what your guests where will have zero impact on your enjoyment of the day.


In my experience, how much guests conform to “dress code” has a lot less to do with the invitation style and request and a lot more to do with how often they attend said events. I.e. my husband’s friends have all had black tie weddings, so pretty much everyone has bought a tux to be ready for each other’s events. If most everyone had semi formal events and one chose a black tie affair, it’s highly unlikely any of the boys would buy a tux, and instead would show up “underdressed” in a suit.

Ugh wear not where!

I do and the weddings I've been to, but I guess it depends on the crowd? Like who you're inviting and what's normal where you live.

I’ve been to only one true black tie wedding, and there were dress requirements because of the venue, so the couple stressed on the website and info cards, that if the dress code isn’t followed, they would not be allowed in. I don’t know if your venue has that restriction, but a true black tie event will usually be followed.