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Just Said Yes July 2020

Do i have to invite my fmil and fsil to get their hair and makeup done with me and my bridesmaids?

Leah421, on March 6, 2020 at 12:14 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 11

For the day of the wedding I'm having a hair and makeup artist come to the venue for me, my mom, my bridesmaids and possibly my grandma if she's interested. I don't particularly want to invite my FMIL or FSIL. I don't have a great relationship with FMIL, its cordial at best and cold and contentious at worst. SIL and I are on fine terms, but she tends to start a lot of drama and can be unkind and inconsiderate (ex: I invited her to be a bridesmaid, she said yes and then had a meltdown while trying on dresses and dropped out of the party).

I would prefer to just be around people I love and am comfortable around, because I know I'll be nervous and emotional to begin with. Is it incredibly rude to not include them?

Side note, I'm paying for everyone's hair and the makeup is optional, the girls are paying for that if they want it. I know neither of them would want their hair done so money isn't a factor.

11 Comments

Latest activity by Angel, on March 31, 2020 at 6:51 PM
  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I don’t think that’s rude. I did the same thing aha. Not that I have a bad relationship with anyone it just was something I wanted to do with my bridesmaids is all
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  • Amber
    Master February 2020
    Amber ·
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    You don't have to invite them if you don't want them to. I will say that inviting them may be a good idea just to extend the olive branch since they're your soon-to-be in-laws. But again, you're definitely not required to invite them to get ready with you if you don't want them there.

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    You don't have to invite them. My 4 sister in laws were all my bridesmaids and my MIL of course got ready with us, but it sounds like we are closer than you guys are. You might want to discuss this with your fiance though and see if it's important to him that you at least offer.

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  • V
    Devoted August 2020
    Valerie ·
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    It’s almost as if I wrote this post myself haha. I will not be inviting FMIL or FSIL to get ready. I am paying for makeup for all my girls and mom and the girls are paying for hair. To be honest, I can stand FMIL and fsil and don’t feel comfortable around them and also want them no where near my getting ready pics. I don’t care for them so they are most certainly not welcome near me on my day
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  • L
    Just Said Yes July 2020
    Leah421 ·
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    Oh yeah he's cool with it - honestly it would probably stress him out more if they were there with me because he'd be worrying out how they might act.

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  • L
    Just Said Yes July 2020
    Leah421 ·
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    Yeah same boat!! I get a lot of "they're going to be your future in laws, make an effort" which like, sure. But at this point I've known them for years and I know keeping a healthy distance between us is whats best for me.

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  • V
    Devoted August 2020
    Valerie ·
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    Are we the same person ? lol I’ve been with my hubby for over 6 years! They never made an effort to get to know me, make me feel welcome or feel like family so why should I try now?
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  • Kendra
    Devoted August 2020
    Kendra ·
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    I love my FMIL but I strongly dislike my FSIL. I invited FMIL to get her hair and makeup done since she will be helping FH's daughter get ready too. My future daughter is getting her hair done with us since she is the Junior Bridesmaid so it isn't that weird. I never bothered to ask my FSIL. That being said, my FMIL isn't really a fan of her either lol.
    I don't think it's weird if you don't want to ask her to join you. We are getting ready at a salon so once my FMIL and FD are ready, they will go get ready with the boys. I know they'd rather be with them anyway.

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  • A
    Super August 2020
    Alex ·
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    You do not have to include them, but it is nice to include them.

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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    No you don't have to invite them.

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  • Angel
    Expert August 2020
    Angel ·
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    You absolutely do not have to invite anyone you don't want to Smiley smile I'm all for the bride having whatever you want that day and whoever you want around. You don't want anything to throw off your big day!

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