TL;DR - bride is having a big wedding because of her family but doesn't want it - we haven't seen each other in forever and I'm a courtesy invite - knowing she isn't thrilled about the big wedding - should I consider not going?
For background - the bride and I were childhood friends but we drifted apart about 10 years ago for no reason other than growing up and establishing other friendships and eventually speaking less and less. She was originally going to be invited to my wedding as a courtesy invite but didn't end up being invited since we decided to downsize our wedding plans by 75%.
The bride has now invited me to her upcoming wedding which I expect is a courtesy invite in return (she knew she was meant to be invited to ours as I asked her for her mailing address prior to deciding to downsize) as we have spoken maybe once or twice in the past few years.
Anyway, a few weeks ago she congratulated me on my wedding and asked me how I felt about having a small wedding explaining that she really didn't want the big wedding she is having and only agreed because of family pressure and that she would much rather have a courthouse wedding. After hearing my thoughts on how much I personally enjoyed having a small wedding and that I should have done it from the start, she told me she would discuss the idea with her fiance because she really didn't want the wedding that had been planned.
RSVPs are due back in a week (wedding is mid March) - do I go? I haven't yet heard if her plans have changed (or asked). I haven't seen her in years and have no issue going but I am also conflicted knowing that the big wedding she is having isn't what she wants, so I don't know if I'd almost be doing her a favour by not going (hence the only reason I'm questioning this).
Thoughts?
