divorced parents in processional

I guess a better way to word my question would be, do we include the new wife in the processional? Would it be rude to ask FH's dad to walk up alone or with FH, or does the new wife need to be allowed to walk up with him, even though it will create tension and she doesn't really have a close relationship with FH?

Might be an UO here but I think he should absolutely be allowed to walk with his wife..

I'm actually reading up on family seating right now! (FH's parents never married, and married other people; I'm dealing with biological and adoptive parents).

From what I've read, groom escorts mom, and groom's father follows. Step-mom COULD walk with groom's father. If FH doesn't have much of a relationship with his step-mom, there really is no reason to have her take part in much, even if she is taking over the RD.

On another note; apparently it's a-ok to seat fathers and step-mothers in the third row if parents are divorced and can't get along.

Good luck!

Personally, with DH's divorced parents and their respective husband and girlfriend, we found it was much easier to keep the peace by being inclusive for stuff like this. Turned out DH's dad's gf couldn't make it to the wedding, so he escorted my widowed Grandmom. But honestly, just being able to say we had ordered the long-time gf a corsage was going to make a world of difference in explaining to FIL why SFIL was wearing a dad's boutonniere..."Oh, hey look! We got one for Laurie, too! Don't be jealous!"

Ashlee, that's not an unpopular op, I agree with you. He needs to walk with his partner in the processional. To not do so would be seen as disrespectful to their union.

Well we had issues like this with DH's parents. They are like two kids fighting if they don't have at least 20 feet between them. Neither of them are remarried so we were kind of confused about how to make this work. So we just had DH walk in with his mom on one arm and my mom on his other arm, and his dad was seated with the rest of the guests (he did not walk down the aisle, he did not mind).

There really is no set protocol for this; some of it depends on your relationship with her, some depends on his mom's relationship, which doesn't sound like a bed of roses.

I'd have the stepmom seated with the guests and have FH and his dad walk together. This is what I see in a vast majority of my weddings. He has to consider his mom's feelings, as illogical as they may seem. Even though she doesn't want to walk with him, it'll be hard to watch her walk with him.

You can tell them your spiritual advisor told you so.

FH's dad been remarried for six years and the parents have been divorced for 20? I would have Dad and his wife walk together.

What does FIL want? I would let her walk with FIL. And 6 years isn't exactly new.

I hear you on this one,

my FH will be escorted by his dad and mom ( who are divorced). FH wife will be seated in the front row and she has no problem with it she respects it's his day.

My bigger issue is reception entrance usually parents walk in together, do you know what you're going to do then?

I think it really depends on what you want. If FH wants to walk with his dad, then his dad can escort his step-mom and come back. Otherwise, I'd have them walk together.

I'm having my step-mom be seated already. She likes to be in the middle of things, but our moms are both walking us in and I don't want to have her be the only one seated during the processional.

@Abhogail- oh gosh I hadn't thought about the introductions! Eek! My first instinct is to introduce his parents separately, or ask them if they can suck it up and walk in together for just that?

@Celia- I like your suggestion, and it meshes with what our day of coordinator also suggested. FFIL walks his wife in before the procession actually starts, then goes back to walk my FH up.

As much as I agree with the other sentiments that FFIL and new wife should walk up together, she really has zero relationship with either of us (FH is 42, his dad married her when he was 36, well out of the house and living ina different state). Plus she's the kind of person I really don't want to throw a bone, because it might encourage her pushiness. She's already tried to worm her way into getting ready with the bridal party.

Both of our parents are divorced, and they are all remarried except my dad. So I'm doing:

FFIL and stepmom

FMIL and stepdad

My mom and stepdad

Bridesmaids

Me and my dad

My mom and stepdad have been married for 17 years, but both of his parents remarried within the last year. So there's definitely a different relationship between my stepdad and I and FH and his stepparents. But I didn't want to exclude my stepdad, and didn't want any tension to arise by excluding his stepparents.

I personally think FFIL should most definitely be able to walk with his current wife down the aisle!

Hopefully she can put her 20 year bitter grudge aside and allow you both to enjoy your special day. I hope everything works out!

Yep, we're going inclusive, too