Divorced Parents Dance Question

Its entirely up to you. If you want to include your stepmother in the dance, you can, but you don't have to. Same thing with the toasts. Do you want both of them or only one? Technically, the toasts are reserved for the host/hosts (who's paying) and the Maid of Honor and Best Man. For instance, for my wedding, we split the cost with his parents and my parents, so my mom and his dad gave short toasts because that's who wanted to of the couples.

My parent aren't married but my dad is getting to do a father-daughter dance and I am contributing a song to my mom since she did all the work of raising me. my stepmom is a big part of my family so am getting her a gift outside of my dads gift. i only would split my dance if you guys are really close if not just get her and you dad two-parent gifts

There isn't a definitive answer because it is completely up to you. If you want to honor your relationship with your stepmother by including a spotlight dance with her, go for it! And toasts can be made by whoever you and your wife designate. Think about who would do best under the pressure and works for the schedule. If you are concerned about having everyone covered, maybe one could give a toast at the reception dinner instead, or one could say the prayer before dinner on wedding night.

Unless you're super close to your stepmom, I'd just do a dance with your mom.


I'd ask your parents if they even want to do a toast. Some people are shy.

My parents are divorced too- they haven't spoke for a while and haven't been in the same room since 2017 when my sister graduated college (which didn't go well). Two years ago my dad remarried to an awesome woman. So, I get your situation.

Personally, I'm not doing anything to acknowledge my dad's new wife, and I've asked that she not be included in family photos. It's not that I don't like her; she great and has been an amazing influence on my dad. But I don't feel that close to her. Also, it would hurt my mom's feelings.

Honestly, just do what you feel would be best. Prayers for you!

How is your relationship with your stepmom? if it's a good one ask your mother what she thinks or how she would feel if you danced half the song with her and half with your stepmom. Or you could even consider a separate dance with the stepmom not as a mother and son dance.

They are there to share your big keep them separated at different tables and do the dance with your mom and do 1 with her. And I know that she may be upset alittle hope hoping that she wouldn't want your big day ruined with sour face just to be respectable for you. I have that problem as well but with my children and my sister dont like each other. But I didn't have any choice because I want my mom at my wedding because she is the only that will bring her here without spending extra money. Mr. Groom I hope that it all works out.

Do whatever makes the most sense for your family. There is no right or wrong, and everyone's family situation is unique!

If any of our parents want to give a toast, it will be at the rehearsal dinner and not the reception. Reception toasts will be by the MOHs and Best Man.

As far as the dances go, I wouldn't expect your stepmom to be included unless she helped raise you. If your stepmom was there through your childhood, I might feel otherwise!

Hi Antonio,

I’m basically just going to reiterate what most other commenters have said: it is entirely your choice. This day is about you and your future spouse. Do what is going to make you happy, not what you think other people want. Instead of thinking about who might have their feelings hurt if you do or don’t do a certain thing, think about this: do you want a special moment with your stepmom? Do you want to hear what your dad has to say about your marriage? If so, go for it! If not, then don’t do it. I don’t want to make assumptions about your relationship with them, so just ask yourself what kind of role you want them to have in your special day.

To give you a little background, my parents are divorced too, and they hate each other. My dad and I have a terrible relationship and hadn’t seen each other in 10 years before I took my fiancé to meet him last Thanksgiving. I struggled for a long time over the decision of whether or not to invite him. Ultimately I decided that, because of our history and how much my father made me dislike myself when I was younger, I decided I didn’t want to feel that way on my wedding day. I told him exactly the way I felt when he asked if he was invited. I was trying to take steps towards improving our relationship by allowing him to meet my future husband but still stood my ground about my decision. Long story short, feelings were hurt. But, is there a point in beating myself up over “ruining” a relationship that was never good to begin with? I chose what was right for me and I don’t regret it. I urge you to choose whatever is right for YOU.