Has anyone ever just wanted to give up on planning?

Have you spoken with your FH about this? If you don't want all the fuss and fanfare, maybe just having a small ceremony and going to a restaurant with immediate family might be an option for you. Or is there something else bugging you that's causing you to not want to plan?

I wanted a big wedding all the way up until September when my cousin had hers. She said it was to much stress and not worth the hassle. Fh doesn't care he wants me happy. But I don't know what makes me happy besides him and his 2 kids that moved in with us about a month ago.

I hear this all the time, basically because the media and social pressure has hammered into your brain that at least 40 vendors (yes, we actually sat down and added them up.....) are necessary for a wedding. It's exhausting. Frankly, I don't even think I could do it, and I'm IN the industry.

I'm loving this concept of planning from the minimum up instead of from the maximum down...all you really need is you, a license and an officiant. Maybe add a nice little restaurant for your best friends and family. Then a dress. Then a suit. ....presto. done. Oh, and ice cream.

I'm with you on this! BUT then I think about not having the glitz and glam and I don't wanna go with out it either so I'm back to square one...

Definitely ice cream. And I couldn't be in the industry I would have a heart attack. But I like thinking minimalistic.

See i don't like attention on me. Fh has slight ptsd from the military and doesn't do well in large groups. So a small ceremony would be great.

CK - getting soo close :-)

Just remember, you dont HAVE to do anything but what Celia said. Take a deep breath girl. As long as your invites haven't been sent, there is still time to change it to a small affair.

No invites yet!

Honestly, I'm having a small-middle sized wedding but since I haven't tried to get caught up in everything it has been fun for me. The stress of work/school/my dad's health make thinking about the wedding enjoyable. If you aren't enjoying planning the wedding, I would reconsider the plan! I love the elopements that get posted on here.

You can always change it to a small affair, have you thought about elopement?

When we first got engaged FH wanted the whole deal, and I wanted to elope. We are now planning the whole deal. I had quite a few months where I didn't want to do anything, and just decided it would be fine whatever happened, now I am really into it though. We rented a little spot on the water in a little pavilion, the people we would really want to be there are going to be, and we are just planning on having a nice daytime wedding and reception. You need to choose a spot that will make you happy and keep it as small as you and your FH want to keep it. There is no reason that you HAVE to have a big fancy wedding. As long as you and FH are happy on your day, that is all that matters, even if that means getting all dressed up and going down to the courthouse and having a nice lunch with some friends (or alone) afterwards. Remember, your wedding is about you guys, no one else.

I liked the idea of running away to Niagara Falls USA and getting married there but I changed my mind when we went there a month ago. And they were doing so much construction

Come to NYC! Central Park! You can have a wedding and a honeymoon all in one ;-)

I wouldn't even know how to find central park lol. I have always wanted to go to the Bronx zoo

Oh, Joelle, sending you hugs! I felt like that a million times. The ice cream addition is better, I just wanted to have pasta, haha.

I agree with everyone else. Take a few days off wedding planning and go out on a nice date with your FH to unwind from this. Then sit down and discuss what you really want. If you decide on a somewhat big wedding, I'm sure you'll be able to pull it off and enjoy it. And if you decide on something small, it'll be just as good. Do what Celia suggested, and discuss your priorities with your FH. What made us stick to the medium-size wedding we had was that DH really wanted ALL of his relatives there. So we were stuck with having 70 guests - we figured we might as well have 110 and invite our friends too. If your family is not as big, or you're not as close to your/his extended family, then go for something small.

We have decided to take our time planning and considering what we really want. We are looking into both options (an intimate wedding or big) and just taking it day by day. Good luck and keep us posted

We have been engaged almost to years. And the more I look at it the more important thinking about having everyone over to my house on Christmas eve (my great grandparents wedding anniversary) and just saying guess what here is the jop and here wevery are

And getting an ice cream cake lol

It's rough. And like Celia said, everything adds to the pressure. I'm like you where I don't like being the center of attention but for me, it worked out well. We had 60 people, all of which I knew except for 2 step-sisters boyfriends (that live on the opposite side of the country and didn't meet till then). That REALLY helped. But also know it's all the people you both love, looking to support you.

I would take until thanksgiving is over away from anything wedding related. Then have a real conversation with FH about your goals and desires. If that works out to be the court house, great! Or if it's 20 people in a backyard, that's great too. But honestly, for as much as I anticipated being anxious around everyone (I had a panic attack at last years Christmas dinner), I did ok.