Flower girl hates me...

She's under three! Chances are she doesn't "hate" you, she just doesn't know you. I wouldn't take it personally. Has your FH talked to your sister in law about dresses for the flower girl / ask her to be more responsive?

View Quoted Comment Wrong way of being sil she's my brothers gf of like 5 years (?) I asked my brother on easter to have her get back to me but nothing yet ik i have time but i really have no1 to discuss this stuff with cuz my other bm is having health issues with her son who my ring bearer, and my nephew's all seem to love me so it's just insulting lol

Wow, have you ever had the opportunity to keep your niece for a day? All of my cousins love me, they range from age 2 to 12. I’ve always been able to get them since they were about 18 months old and take them to fun places like Chuck E’ Cheese, or the botanical gardens.

When my niece was 2 and a half to 3, her attitude toward me shifted by the day. Sometimes she loved me. Other times she was scared of me. She eventually grew out of it and is now always happy to see me (she's 4 now). I wouldn't take it personally. In the grand scheme of things, she only learned object permanence a little over a year ago!

I have a toddler close in age. It doesn't sound like she hates you... Just you need to have get to know you time. Maybe offer to babysitting? Some kids are just shy. Maybe play blocks together or something she's interested in. I am sure the parents would appreciate a date night.

When is the wedding vs your flower girl dress timeline? Maybe the mom is busy? Is there any Easter dresses you saw her wear you like?

If your date is correct, you have a year until the wedding (and that year will, literally, be a THIRD of your niece's life). It's completely normal for toddlers to have "stranger anxiety," so I'm sure she doesn't "hate you." As a PP mentioned, if you have the opportunity to spend time with her, take advantage of it. Other than that, I'd try not to stress about any of this. BM's dresses can be ordered a month or two before the wedding (check out Azazie, if you're looking for options) and the FG's dress can be bought off the rack the week of the wedding. I'm sorry others aren't as interested or available as you'd like, but it might be better for you and your relationships with your bridal party to let things go for a while. Work on wedding plans with FH for now. Good luck to you.

It is wrong to force physical intimacy on anyone, especially a child. Please do not do that. Just be polite, a lot can change in a year.

Toddlers can be very tricky to connect with. You should try to do something fun with her in a one-on-one setting.

View Quoted Comment No i haven't i live with my fmil and fhs brother n don't have my own Car so cant have her here

View Quoted Comment Thanks ! Maybe it'll just take time

View Quoted Comment Its somthing from etsy so can be ordered whenever. N she wore a minnie mouse turu n didnt see her last easter

View Quoted Comment I dont force it i ask for a gig is she says no i mind on to the next kid. And she always hides next my gma or mom and never wants to play with the other kids

Likely when you asked fbil's girlfriend to be bm, and her daughter to be flower girl, she expects the bridesmaid dresses to be bought in the last 4 months, as is usually the case. And toddler clothes are most often bought within last 2 months because they grow in unpredictable fast spurts. . So she may have thought you were generally indicating likes and dislikes, not expecting an answer, since it is way too early to buy the dresses.

View Quoted Comment I understand the Etsy struggle. My flower girl dress has to be ordered about a month or 2 months in advance for international shipping reasons and I am somewhat nervous about fit. I am looking for the Amazon plan b and hoping not to use it. I am the mother of the flower girl / bride. I am going for a Pippa Middleton flower girl look as worn by princess Charlotte. It's perfect for a Valentine's day wedding.

The dress should be ordered almost at the last possible minute. Plus there is no way to know the answer to that question. My daughter hated dresses and loved pants 4 months ago and now she loves dresses and hates pants/ shorts... The what the flower girl likes this soon is kinda a let me get crystal ball question. It really is impossible to answer. Kids are very hard to predict.

View Quoted Comment Kid's just a normal shy kid. I was a shy kid. She doesn't hate everyone. Just offer to play blocks (or activity she enjoys) every now and then and don't take the answer personal. Not persistently but once and if she says no it's not you.

It shouldn't be insulting. She's 2 years old and doesn't even have the mental capacity to "hate" anyone. As for your SIL, there should be a little more communication. However, it's your wedding so pick the dress and move on. And maybe the toddler just isn't as comfortable with you yet, try hanging around her more often.