Bear with me y'all, this is more of a vent/ rant. Okay, so I first met his family 2 years into dating (we met overseas so I met them when I came back to the USA). And they were cold and stand offish and I figured it was because they didn't know me and were learning about me. Fast forward 2 years and I attend their Thanksgiving and they were lukewarm. They were never rude but not once did they try to engage. They said hi, how are you and ended there. The only people who engaged me was his older sister's husband and HIS parents.
Fast forward a year to our engagement. His older two sisters and brother flat out say NO, we will not come to the wedding. It's not a money issue, as my dad would be paying for their entire stay, all they have to do is get there. The sister who is closest in age to him says that she will come, right? So, I ask her to be a bridesmaid and told her I would take care of everything all she would have to do is give me her measurements by a certain deadline. She said okay.
Now, that we *might* have a possibility of a family member coming my parents reach out to his mother and siblings to meet them in August of 2018. (as they have never met them). His mother, and oldest sister and her family then decide to take a family vacation in August to avoid meeting my family.
My dad and I DEFINITELY didn't take that well. My mother was more forgiving and said "you know it's hard for people to meet new people". So, my mom tried to reach out to my FH's mom and talk on the phone. FH's mom answered the phone and was nice enough. My mom was happy and thought she had gotten through and then sent her flowers and a card. She never heard back, not even a thank you. Once again, that didn't sit well with me.
Fast forward again to January 1, 2019 and I have not heard from his sister. I get a random Facebook message from her last month apologizing for missing the deadline and asking if she and her boyfriend can still come to the wedding. (It is too late) but I decided to make an exception for her because I would like my FH to have at least one family member there. So my dad is comp'ing her stay and making her boyfriend pay.
I ask her if she would still like to be apart of the wedding and if she would be willing to do the mother/son dance in place of their mother who isn't coming. She said NO to both. But then still wanted to make sure she's being comp'd. I secretly hope the resort runs out of room and she can't come.
Granted, FH does not have a close relationship with them but still he's still your brother/son celebrating one of the biggest days of his life.
I hate these people. Is it wrong that I do? I told my FH that his family is actively racist and he got very mad. I don't know why he can't accept or believe it. The kicker is that two of the daughters married white husbands. So either they don't like me cause I'm black or have the "no new friends" attitude, either way their assholes.
