Catholic brides: full Mass or not?

I'm not Catholic and have never felt slighted by not being able to receive communion.

Full mass. It's important to you. As long as FH agrees. You shouldn't worry about slighting others because you won't be doing that.

I'm not Catholic and I have never felt offended when I couldn't take communion. If its important to both of you, you should do the full mass.

If it's important to you I'd do the full mass. I'm not Catholic, but FH was in a wedding last year where they had a full mass and I didn't feel left out or slighted at all! The ceremony is the most important part, so it should reflect what's important to the couple.

I’m Catholic and I had the same dilemma. However, we are getting married on a Sunday so we are not having a full mass. If it’s important to you, and your FH is okay with it, go for the full mass.

My husband is not Catholic, and neither is his family. We had a full mass with about 200 guests, and probably 75-80 took communion. Our priest was great, and announced before it started that anyone who was not Catholic could come up for a blessing or stay in their pew if they preferred. I think it worked out great, and I'm so glad we did the full mass.

Definitely do the full mass, other people should not dictate how you and your spouse get married. My husband side doesn't have the sacrament to receive communion but we are having g a full mass anyways. It's how we want to be joined in front of God and we let our guest know by word of mouth what to expect. That's all you can really do is just inform them

Just want to add an additional perspective. My dad's family is Catholic and my three married cousins have all had full masses. The first two married Catholics so even though it wasn't my preference, it was fine. The most recent wedding a few weeks ago, the groom's family was all from OOT and none of them were Catholic and I felt it was very awkward as one side was just sitting there and the other side was saying all the prayers, doing the kneeling, etc. The wedding felt one-sided and I didn't feel like it reflected the joining together of the couple and their two families. It was very much the bride's ceremony, if that makes sense. However, if it's really important to you and it's what you both want for your wedding, just do it. I don't personally enjoy sitting through mass, but it's an extra half hour of my life, not a big deal.

I am catholic and I made it clear on my wedding website. That I am having a catholic mass. I made sure to state that all religious are welcomed to assist to my marriage celebration. It's normal not everyone in Sunday mass can take the communion unless they have done their communion. Don't stress about it! It will work out fine. I just think as long as those people are there they should be part of big day whether they believe in religion or not.

Though not done at a wedding, perhaps your priest might be agreeable to something like this...

At my Dad's funeral mass, when time came for communion, the priest explained the meaning of communion and that it was for practicing catholics, however he understood that there were non-catholics (or those not prepared to receive) were present. Those individuals were welcome to come up, with arms crossed and hands on opposite shoulders, to receive a simple blessing instead of communion.

It was a beautiful way to be inclusive of all faiths in this part of the ceremony.

Do what is important to you for the ceremony. I will fully admit that I am not at all religious and do get bored during a full mass ceremony. However, these are my nearest and dearest friends weddings, so I just make sure to do an extra cup of coffee beforehand and I'm happy to support them on their day even if its not what I'd do on my day. Anyone that is close to you will want to support you, if they don't, they aren't people you want at your wedding anyway.

I agree that you should do what is important to you both! DH and I are catholic, and most of my family and friends are Catholic while a good portion of his family was not. We still did the full mass, we even had some responses in Latin because that’s how it’s done at our church. Several non Catholic people commented later on how beautiful and special it was to hear Latin in the Mass. We also made sure there wasn’t the traditional ‘Catholic gap’ which was much appreciated by both sides of the family :-)

Definitely mass. Our priest is an extremely welcoming man and will make an announcement welcoming non-Catholics to come up for a blessing. You could make programs so people can know what the appropriate responses are and participate I didn't get around to the programs but it's a thought.

Okay so I am literally having this same exact dilemma right now. FH isn't catholic and neither are any of the guests he's inviting but probably like 90% of the ones I am inviting are. Having a full mass is super important to me. I asked the priest the other day at our first meeting with him and he said that we could have a full mass but we have to think about the guests who won't be able to take communion but it's up to us. Honestly, it may sound selfish but the day is about us, not about the guests and if a full mass is important to you I would say go for it. If your guests really care about you they won't care if they have to sit there while everyone gets communion.

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@FirstTimeMOB That sounds like maybe the best solution. In fact I think I've heard a priest make such an announcement before (though not often). Thanks!

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@Diana Ooohhh, printing something in the program is a super great idea! Thanks!