Bridesmaid backed out

Don't ask anyone to replace her and don't kick out a groomsman. Tell her you're sorry she doesn't want to be included in the wedding party but you hope she can still attend as a guest. The sides don't need to be even.

Bridal parties don't have to be even. Keep everything the same with the exception of the one girl who no longer wants to do it.

ETA: I would also make sure your friend knows you would be honored to have her stand up there with you regardless of what she weighs and that she's beautiful, but that it's totally her call on what she's most comfortable with.

I would do what the people above said plus add if she ever changes her mind you would still be honored if she was your bridesmaid. Also, maybe use this as a way to be there for her because she said she's feeling insecure

Wow that is unfortunate. Is the maid of honor walking with someone? We are having out maid of honor walk alone.

One bm can walk down the aisle with 2 gm

Bridal parties don't need to be even. We had our BMs walk in alone, and during the recessional, two lucky guys got to escort two of my lovely bridesmaids out.

I agree with PPs- make sure your friend knows she is beautiful and you would love to have her up there with you on your wedding day, but you support whatever decision she makes, and that you just want her to be comfortable.

Don't get a back up and don't kick anyone out. Just tell her you think she is beautiful just the way she is which is one reason you didn't hesitate to ask her to stand with you on your day. But let her know you understand and regret that she won't be able to stand with you.

Well I went ahead and asked one of my friends who lives many states away who I didn't originally know would be able to make it to the wedding.

The bridesmaid that backed out was in the wedding party with her boyfriend who is my fiancée's best friend and now she's saying he doesn't want to be in it either cause of her so she is going to do it after I already messaged someone else and asked her 50 times if she was sure

BMs and GMs are people, not props. Please don't ask a "back up" BMs or kick out a GMs, that is rude. Sides can be even. Let her know that you respect her decision either way, but you would love to have her stand by your side. Is there a dress style that would increase her comfort and confidence? ETA: So you asked for advice, then completely ignored said advice to do what you probably had planned on doing in the first place.......

I was using dresses through azazie and letting everyone pick their own. To be honest she's been pretty difficult with the whole wedding process and adding a lot of drama and stress so I wasn't too disappointed she backed out, she told me to go ahead and message my friend flying in and see if she'll do it and then changed her mind and now wants to do it again.

I'm definitely not treating them like props, I told her I didn't want to make her do anything she didn't want to do, my other friend I don't think would be insulted at all, she would be honored to be a bridesmaid, I just didn't know till recently she would actually be able to make the wedding.

Wait so now she is going to be in the wedding? Well that's good, since she's your friend and you wanted her to be a bridesmaid. And since you went ahead and replaced her you're up a bridesmaid! Yay!

Dont replace her and dont kick out a grooms man - have uneven sides!

You asked a question and within 12 min contacted another bridesmaid?

They aren't props, but you were considering kicking out a GMs to make your sides even? Okay. ETA: And I'm assuming you were looking for validation for a poor decision that you had already planned on making.

The only reason I contacted another one was because I know specifically with her it wouldn't be bad etiquette considering the situation, plus the bridesmaid that backed out told me to do it. I'm not looking to be bashed, sorry if I rushed a decision this whole thing is just so stressful and I've never been married before so I'm learning. But thanks for the judgement.

And no I was saying I wouldn't kick out a groomsmen

I thought the sides had to be even

Accept it graciously and still include her in any pre-wedding activities that you would have otherwise. Definitely do not replace her and do not kick out a GM!!! That would be horrible! The sides do not need to match.

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You're not getting bashed.

Etiquette is not dependent on certain people, so it doesn't make sense that you'd say with this new bridesmaid it's not bad etiquette. It still is.