Advice/vent:Tastings are only during the week and no PTO YET!

Continued: I know people are going to say then pay for it yourself but my parents would be extremely offended and hurt if they couldn't pay for my wedding.

Is your wedding planner aware that you are both starting new jobs? Maybe they can schedule a late meeting during the day and you could work an earlier schedule that day?

Have you told your mom/wedding planner how you feel? If not, you should speak up. (politely)

Can she do weeknights?

Can you offer to work late another day and then flex the time?

The wedding planners response when I mentioned the new jobs was you will need to schedule some time off then if you really want to do a tasting. Which kind of annoyed me. Like it's not that easy.

I may be able to flex my hours but my FH can't . That's a good idea I didn't think asking about an evening tasting. I work 11-7 so I may be able to flex to 8-4 and FH gets off at 6.

The other problem where the wedding planner is and cater is located is like 45 min to an hr away so it's a lot of back and forth traveling on a weeknight and may make us getting there at like 7-8

@shibba I haven't yet because one person I confided in with that issue about responded well of course your moms the one paying so I didn't know if that was how it was supposed to be or not

Can you send your parents to the tasting instead? Can the planner get the caterer to do something in the evening during the week?

Tell the planner the times that work for you and if the caterer can't do a tasting at any of those times then you need a different caterer.

@anna my parents live way out of state. That's why we hired the wedding planner so I wouldn't have to do everything alone and bc my mom wasn't familiar with the vendors in the area and stuff.

I can try and ask her about that. I don't usually vent on here but I am today bc I usually vent to my mom and she knows what to do or how to handle it but she's on vacation for the next 10 days for my parents 30th anniversary.

Thanks to everyone for trying to help me find a solution.

Kayla, this is what the wedding planner is for. To plan a wedding for you stress free. She is not doing her job. We just had the tasting last week at 8 am on Sun morning. Weekend are hard for the caterer because those are the busiest. But they can find time for you and your planner should help negotiate that.

Also are you conflicted about this caterer or are you just selecting menu?

If you are only selecting menu, you have plenty of time to do the tasting.

@ouida I may talk about that point you made about her not doing her job when my mom comes back. It's just my mom always says "she's been doing this for 25 years trust her".

And I just don't want to take the wedding planners word for it that the food is good because my FH and I are picky eaters. We want to make sure we like what they make.

I think they should be more accommodating to you since they're getting paid and probably very well but that said. Can you do the tasting in the AM since you work at 11? I thought bakeries opened pretty early. I think if the baker wants your business she will work something out with you.

I would deal with the baker directly.

I can but the problem is FH wants to do the tasting too (he's stubborn about a few things with the wedding and this is one of them)

You might need to see if your parents can attend the tasting if not go with a different caterer for sure.

@natasha I may put it that way to my wedding planner. Either they need to accommodate our schedules or I want to go with a different caterer.

Unfortunately, my parents live 8-9hr drive away and that's without traffic so that's not an option

Is there a possibility to have the tasting on your lunch break? Idk how a tasting works since we're not having one, so forgive me if it takes longer than an hour

Ask the planner to pickup the meals to go and deliver for lunch . Make a lunch date out of it for you and your FH.

Not an option it's an hr away from our work places and my job is an outreach mental health specialist so I won't have a set lunch time just in between clients

@futuremrs

I wish! That would be cute but our jobs are not right by eachother

Well if the option is just you tasting or no one tasting I would go

Ahead and do it yourself early in the am before work. He will get over it.

Have you spoken to the baker yourself? I would go around the wedding planner about this.