Disagreement on dates

I'm having a short engagement. It is hard but sometimes men do not understand how much goes into planning. Maybe sit down with a list of everything that has to be decided and explain that he has to be fully involved to help you plan something. However 10 months is not too short of time. My sister did hers in 5. And I had a friend take 3 years. It's all about it is manageable for you and your life.

Can you pay for a wedding next fall? Can you get the venue and the photographer that you want? If any of these are a no, you should postpone until you can get everything you want. You only get one shot (hopefully) at a wedding. Do it the way you want.

I would put together a budget, potential guest list, and start touring potential venues. If you are willing to do a Sunday or possibly day wedding, you might be able to work an October wedding. You also need to sit down with both of your families and see if there are no conflicting plans already.

I got engaged in March and married in October. It was plenty of time, but I was flexible on the date and willing to go with any Saturday in a 3 or 4 month window that the venue had open. If you can afford to do it in October, I would do that. The longer your engagement, the longer time you have to stress out about details and potentially spend over budget.

If you know you want a super elaborate wedding with all the bells and whistles, including the "perfect" dress or anything like that, you should probably allow more time to plan. I wanted a nice event, well hosted, and dress/decor/etc that was nice but simple. I had no issues with a seven month timeline.

This is a personal preference. If you want to and can afford to get married in 8 months, it’s absolutely possible. We have a 2 year engagement (that’s almost over) because we just weren’t in a rush. I had everything planned and booked before a year in. I could have done it in less time, but we didn’t want to stretch too thin on our expenses. Some people don’t see the need to wait. We didn’t see the need to rush. End result is the same either way. Up to you.

Look at how much you can save each month an dhow much you'd like to spend. Doing that was a wake up call for my FH.

I got engaged last November. But when we started wedding planning and our actual wedding date, it’s obly been 3 months. Before that we didn’t look at anything and then just one day decided “this is it, let’s get married in January”

I really think it's all about your budget and what your expectations are. Once you have your budget in place, start checking to see what venues are available in that time frame. If it's doable, go for it! We had exactly 365 days to plan our wedding and honestly because of my health and Christmas, we took a break from planning for a while and it still feels completely doable.

An 8 month engagement is definitely doable... 3 friends of mine when through a similar timeline last year and the day was beautiful. One thing to strongly consider is do you have the budget to do it in 8 months. If you have the money then go for it and make a list and timeline and stick to your tasks. However, if you don't have the money to do it within the year than I would sit him down and have a talk with him about being realistic about it.

Congratulations on your recent engagement! Wedding in October is totally doable. You actually have 10 months. My only hesitation is that you’re the one who wants to wait. Unfortunately because of gender norms, women often do the heavy lifting during wedding planning. My advice is to start touring venues you like together. That way you’ll see if any venues in your area are still available in October and once your FH sees the actual dollar signs for the wedding, he may agree that waiting a bit makes sense financially. If a venue you both like is available in October and he promises to be actively involved in planning, then go for it. But once you have the venue contract, run to find your photographer, hair and makeup artist, dress shopping etc. I’m having a 16 month engagement and from my perspective I think it can be done in 10 just because I’ve taken a couple of months off here and there. You won’t have that luxury. But any wedding stress would be over sooner than if you had a longer engagement.

October is 10 months so you may actually be good as long as you can afford it. Your dress will take about 8 months to come in so I’d try to get that in January. You two need to find a venue and start hiring vendors. Just keep in mind that each vendor and the venue need a deposit. For our venue we had to give $2,000 Deposit, and each of our vendors required $500 to reserve the date. Just be prepared to be spending money rather quickly but overall I think ten months is totally doable.

I think 10 months is enough time to plan a wedding. We are planning ours in 8 months. It's definitely doable. We booked everything this past September and all we have to do now is assemble decor but we also hired a day of coordinator. I don't feel rushed or stressed. Just make sure you are organized.

You could do it as long as you can afford it.

I am right there with you only it’s my mother who is pushing for a short engagement. We just got engaged and the date is set for July 2018. I am a procrastinator as it is, so the rush isn’t too hard on me yet. I’d say if you want to wait longer, do it and tell your fiancé that it will all be worth it to take a bit more time to plan a wedding you are both happy with.

My first wedding I planned in 3.5 months. I kept it small and local. Finding an inclusive venue helps a ton with the planning.

This time I have 7 months to plan. I'm still keeping it small, local and an inclusive venue.

The little details don't interest me. Looking at the big picture, once the venue that included food/ alcohol, location, table settings, cake and day of coordinator was booked, the only things I had to worry about was invitations, dress/ tux, flowers, DJ, officient and photographer.

Prioritize what's important to you and your FH and go from there.

Also maybe take a look at some venues before you decide. I was surprised to see our venue was booked more than a year out. This may help your fiancé understand all the nuances related to timing.

As others are mentioning, the dress can be a big timeline thing, which is why I specifically called it out in my earlier comment. But don't let that scare you off if you aren't particularly worried about the dress. I ordered one from China for about $100, alterations were another $135. It took less than two weeks to get to me and a month for alterations at a local shop. I ordered one w a corset back so there would be a little more flexibility if the sizing was off by a bit. It fit almost perfectly, just needed bustle and hem and a couple tiny things.

This worked for me because I wanted a dress that was "fine" and didn't have my heart set on a specific style or feel or falling in love with my dress. So it's a place I saved a ton on money and timeline, vs what a lot of others do. But again, it's all about what are you willing to compromise on.

I couldn't do it, but lots of people have! I just know myself and knew I would be less stressed with a longer engagement (2 yrs). I was able to secure the vendors we really loved early on and now 10 months out we just need to nail down a florist, hairstylist and BM/GM attire. I think as long as you can afford it, and you can be flexible with dates, vendors and can start dress shopping asap you will be fine. As PP suggested, create a budget and figure it out from there. Good luck!

Can a wedding be planned in 8 months? Of course - with the right budget and flexibility regarding vendors, as first choice venues and vendors may already be booked up. If you’re flexible, have the money, and get to planning now, you can make it work.

It's definitely possible to pull off a wedding in that time, but it does depend on a few factors. Do you currently have a budget in place and a preliminary guest list made? And can you afford it by next October? My FH and I did not want to wait two years to get married (I mean, who does? We wanted to marry each other when we got engaged haha) but the wedding we wanted required us to wait a little longer. We also both wanted a specific venue and it's particularly popular around here and books up a minimum of a year out.