Dinner before the wedding??

So you just want to take your bridal party and families to dinner before your wedding? This isn’t really the same as a tiered wedding and I don’t see any reason why it would be considered rude as long as your reception is at a non-meal time since you’ll only be serving apps.

I think if you want a smaller celebration than that should be what you have. Your husband’s family shouldn’t get a say since it’s not their wedding. If I was invited to a tiered wedding I would decline.

I wouldn’t have a problem with what you’re planning, provided that your ceremony and reception are late enough that they don’t fall over a mealtime - but it sounds like they won’t, if you’re doing dinner first. Apps and drinks later in the evening sounds really nice (or you could do desserts) but if you’re inviting people over a mealtime you need to feed them. I wouldn’t call it tiered either - I tend to think that’s when you don’t invite everyone to the ceremony, or invite some people to the reception after the meal for dancing, when it’s very obvious that not everyone has been invited to everything. No one who isn’t invited even needs to know that you’re doing dinner with your bridal party and families first!

Question, will you be having a rehersal dinner the night before? Besuase the people you descibed as coming to the "wedding dinner" seem to be the same group of poeple you would normally invite to the rehersal dinner. so, you're going to have two small gathering dinners for these people in 2 days. Just something to think about. I think ultimately it depends on the timeline of your wedding day. As previous posters have said, you can have an apps and drink reception but it would be rude not to supply a meal if it is during a meal time.

View Quoted Comment I agree with kelly that you should have what you want. My FH family would’ve loved to have a bigger wedding celebration but they weren’t paying and it wasn’t their wedding so I had the wedding I wanted. Our compromise was his parents threw us a backyard “wedding celebration” two weeks later where they invited more extended family and family friends etc.

I think this set up will be fine. You’re still having a celebration with apps and drinks for everyone to celebrate during and as long as it’s not during a meal time (which I assume it isn’t if you’re having dinner much earlier). No one will even know you treated a smaller group to dinner first. I would consider what Mariangeli said about a rehearsal dinner though.

View Quoted Comment This is the same thing I was thinking. The dinner you are suggesting beforehand sounds an awful lot like a rehearsal dinner. You could always do that the day before. Then you could the ceremony and cocktail/hors d’oeuvre reception.

Personally, I wouldn’t want to do this just because I wouldn’t want to be in my gown with hair and makeup done and then have a big meal before the ceremony and before everyone saw me. If I was a bridesmaid, I’d feel the same way.

I don’t really think it’s acceptable to have a large wedding reception without dinner, unless it’s very heavy apps/food stations. If you do it with just light apps, I’d make sure people know to eat first. I’d always assume I was getting a meal at a wedding.

I guess it depends on your crowd & guest list. I'd find this offensive, and so would all our friends and family.