Difficult bridemaids

Is your cousin a photographer? Were you paying her to take your engagement photos? Asking someone to participate in your wedding party is entirely different from hiring them for a service.

View Quoted Comment Shes not a professional photographer, and she offered to take photos. She didnt ask for money, but i was going to pay her. Not a whole lot, but i was mostly considering it a wedding gift because thats what she offered. Ive done similar for her.
So its like kind of the same as participating in a wedding. It wasnt like i was hiring her as a professional vendor. Another thing is, we do live far apart and i understand that, so maybe my two friends and i can get in the car and go to them if thats the issue, but idk what it is.

Is your cousin normally reliable? If she isn't then I wouldn't expect her to be any different when it comes to your wedding. This may be a one time thing. Something may have come up, she might have forgotten, or she might just not be reliable. You know your cousin the best. Since you aren't requiring your girls to wear the same dress your cousin can go on her own to get a dress. She doesn't need anyone with her to get a dress. If you wanted everyone in the same dress then that would be a different story. Also while you might like them to meet up before the wedding that isn't necessary. You can definitely schedule something, but I wouldn't make it a requirement. Your bridesmaids have other things besides your wedding so meeting up with people they don't know likely isn't a high priority. If you do end up having to drop both of them as bridesmaids that is going to cause a lot of strain on your relationship. Also, why would you need to add more bridesmaids?

View Quoted Comment Thats probably true. Its not like you have to know everyone youre in a wedding with. I wanted everyone to meet up once to like determine what people would prefer as the dresses, but i guess i could always make a group chat and we could shop online. She doesnt need to be "reliable" to text back.

View Quoted Comment I would just do a group chat if you aren't requiring specific dresses. While it sucks she doesn't seem to be reliable hopefully she can manage to get a dress and show up to the wedding on time. We had people who didn't know each other. They met at the bridal shower and bachelorette party.