H
Dedicated October 2019

Did you settle when choosing a venue?

H, on November 8, 2017 at 10:34 AM

Posted in Planning 81

Did you find that you settled when choosing a wedding venue? I'm realizing that what my PERFECT DAY entails is not possible either because it's impractical, doesn't exist, or is $500 per person for a Saturday evening (LOL-- thanks NJ). Did you have must-haves that you stuck with? Or did you let go...

Did you find that you settled when choosing a wedding venue?

I'm realizing that what my PERFECT DAY entails is not possible either because it's impractical, doesn't exist, or is $500 per person for a Saturday evening (LOL-- thanks NJ).

Did you have must-haves that you stuck with? Or did you let go of some of your wants? Did you think you hated X but ended up getting X in the end and not really caring? Did you want a beautiful venue but think that a not so beautiful venue would be more convenient because it had accommodations for guests?

Just curious about everyone else's selections and decisions!

81 Comments

  • Ginggotthering
    Devoted August 2018
    Ginggotthering ·
    • Flag

    When I went looking for my venue I had a general budget in mind. We moved our dream wedding from a Saturday in October to a Thursday night in august. I was willing to sacrifice month and day, but not my venue. We can only use their exclusive caterer, so I negotiated over a week about per price. We were originally quoted 155 a person, minimum 125.. I brought it down to 130 in cluding taxes and 100 person minimum. Don't be afraid to negotiate and ask what they can do for you. If they want your business they will work with you. Btw I am in nj, but having my wedding in pa

    • Reply
  • Malei
    Super October 2018
    Malei ·
    • Flag

    I was essentially looking for cheap and I found it! But then realized that it would create a gap for our guests and would limit our ability to decorate or make it more "our style." So we opted for something else that may cost more but we'll be better hosts for it AND it's outdoors and gorgeous with a laid back feel... definitely more our style. So happy we didn't go cheap.

    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Dedicated October 2018
    Kelly ·
    • Flag

    I did not settle on my venue- although it was the first one I saw in person (I did a lot of research before hand). The venue comes with everything and is gorgeous, comes with catering, cake, center pieces, and open bar.

    • Reply
  • H
    Dedicated October 2019
    H ·
    • Flag

    @snowangel and @celia ..

    thank you both so much for your willingness help! Celia -- i wrote down all of those suggestions to research!

    So far I've personally visited Chauncey Hotel, The Grand Summit Hotel, Old Mill Inn, Stonehouse at Stirling Ridge, Oakeside Mansion in Bloomfield... Also planning on seeing the Madison Hotel soon.

    I thought I originally wanted a tented venue -- the more casual the vibe, the better. But I'm realizing it might not be the best idea given unpredictability of weather. I never wanted the traditional type of ballroom which is where I think I'm struggling. So if we went with a more "traditional" wedding with a ballroom, I lean towards the more modern looking ones. Stonehouse was absolutely gorgeous. I'm also obsessed with the conservatory at the Madison Hotel but we'd have to cut down our guest list and I'm getting the vibe from my parents that it might not be possible (they are contributing towards our venue).

    I'm all up in the air with my wants right now. I go from wanting to elope to wanting a typical wedding in the same night. Oy.

    • Reply
  • H
    Dedicated October 2019
    H ·
    • Flag

    Thank you ALL for your input!! I'm carefully reading every one of your comments Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    April 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    The Stonehouse's new venue, on the same property, is stunning. The Madison is stunning too, in a different way. We just did their show on Monday, and the conservatory is just gorgeous at night.

    You might look at Factory 220, in Passaic if you're looking for an industrial vibe....

    How many people are we talking?

    • Reply
  • snowangel
    Super March 2017
    snowangel ·
    • Flag

    Okay so I think I'm starting to get what you are looking for...you want something more unique than a typical ballroom, but somewhere that can still accommodate a larger guest list and have a lot of the amenities and comforts people are used to having at weddings. Does that sound about right? We actually looked at Stonehouse and Madison Hotel too! Similarly to you, we liked the Conservatory Room, but our guest list was too large for that space and we didn't like that their ballroom had no windows. I liked the look of Stonehouse, but it was a little too far from my family's church where the ceremony was going to be. I'm not sure what your budget is, but these are the places I would check out. Take a look and let me know what you think, I'd be happy to do more research. I miss wedding planning so much lol! Indian Trail Club - Franklin Lakes, Liberty House - Jersey City, Ryland Inn - Whitehouse Station, Rock Island Lake Club - Sparta, Bear Brook Valley - Fredon, Orange Lawn Tennis Club - South Orange, Edgewood County Club - River Vale, Park Avenue Club - Florham Park (they are currently building their brand new ballroom, but the promo pics look amazing!).

    • Reply
  • K
    Just Said Yes April 2018
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag

    My original venue closed its doors unexpectedly and found a new venue. Not as happy but it is about the happily ever after!!!

    • Reply
  • Bailey
    Devoted January 2018
    Bailey ·
    • Flag

    We didn't settle at all. In fact, the only reason we looked at a 2nd venue is to talk my fiance into letting us pay the price tag that came with the venue. We got really lucky, though, because when we told the lady the date (a Sunday in off season) we got the venue for 1/4 the cost! Tables, chairs, and linens provided! It's perfect for what we wanted. Spacious, simple, and elegant.

    • Reply
  • Yoomie
    VIP October 2018
    Yoomie ·
    • Flag

    I didn't settled. We fell in love with the first venue we toured. In addition to fitting our vision, it came with all that we were looking for. We did tour another venue that same day but only because it was already scheduled and good for comparison purposes. We were 19 months out but we booked immediately to reserve our date.

    • Reply
  • AQuixoticBride
    VIP July 2018
    AQuixoticBride ·
    • Flag

    I didn't settle, but I never had an idea of perfect, either. The venue I really wanted turned out to be too expensive, came with nothing, and the courtyard where we would have had the reception and ceremony has a hard time draining water when it rains (so happy we looked at venues in the rain), so not actually practical, especially for July. The venue we booked was a last minute decision to even look at because I only wanted to look at a few venues, plus this one also has an interesting history like the first, but also not haunted, which everyone *says* the first one is.

    • Reply
  • Kristen328
    Super September 2018
    Kristen328 ·
    • Flag

    My dream was to have our wedding in the Adirondack Mountains. My favorite venue was a ski lodge where the ceremony would have taken place literally on a mountain with amazing views (you take the ski lift up). But it would have been at least a 2 hour drive for everyone, and there isn't a ton of lodging in the area. Or transportation. I was worried about guests getting home safely. We ended up booking our country club which is literally a mile from my house, and most OOT guests will either have a relative to stay with in town or several hotels to choose from within a few miles. It's definitely not what I envisioned but we're both happy with it.

    • Reply
  • Kelsey
    Expert October 2018
    Kelsey ·
    • Flag

    We ended up settling/compromising. Our dream venue was going to be out of our price range. But, we love our current venue and it had all of the "must haves".

    • Reply
  • K squared
    Super October 2017
    K squared ·
    • Flag

    One thing the hubster and I wouldn't settle on was a venue with a beautiful outdoor space. We wanted people to be able to hang outside with their drinks if they so chose. And they did. Our outside deck was heavily populated most of the reception.

    • Reply
  • Dolores Umbridge
    VIP June 2017
    Dolores Umbridge ·
    • Flag

    We (I) did a lot of research online. We already knew we didn't want what was trendy and popular now (i.e. barn, rustic, and definitely NOT outdoors. one thing you can't control is the weather and i 100% didn't want to worry about it) we knew we didn't want it anywhere we had past events such as proms, banquets, sports events. and we didn't want a gold course or ballroom.

    We found a company online that we eventually realized a cousin was married at years ago and i still remember their wedding so vividly i knew we had to visit their properties. They have 6 venues around the city and we got pricing and minimums for our 4 favorite and visited them. It was an easy choice after that.

    • Reply
  • H
    Dedicated October 2019
    H ·
    • Flag

    Celia and snowangel I've been trying to respond to you but it's not letting me send what I typed out...

    • Reply
  • H
    Dedicated October 2019
    H ·
    • Flag

    Celia - I went to that showcase on Monday! Loved the conservatory but our guest list is likely too big. Expecting about 175.

    • Reply
  • H
    Dedicated October 2019
    H ·
    • Flag

    Snowangel - I'm adding some of those to my new list. I have some already. I love the look of Rock Island but it's a tad pricier than we want and I don't love the location. But I could totally get over that if we decide that's what we are looking for.

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    April 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    Rock Island is amazing (and the bacon station kicks ass....) I'm actually going there tomorrow.....

    I'm planning to move into their 'getting ready' room. It's bigger than my house, lol....

    I know they do a LOT of Thursdays there....just sayin'...

    • Reply
  • MrsMcK
    VIP September 2017
    MrsMcK ·
    • Flag

    Nope. We had it exactly where we wanted to have it, and where I'd envisioned having it for a long time.

    Don't settle! I mean, work within your budget, but don't book a spot that you don't love.

    ETA: good luck with your search!

    • Reply

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