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Gen
Champion June 2019

“Did you get this as our wedding gift to you?”

Gen, on February 17, 2020 at 12:41 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 8
Super awkward situation... we invited a family to our wedding which was almost 9 months ago now. They declined, as one of them was graduating college that same weekend. We never received a gift from them. No hard feelings of course, I couldn’t care less that they didn’t send a gift and never gave it a second thought, especially because they didn’t attend.


However my mom was just talking with a woman from that family and she asks my mom “did they get the swimming with dolphins package on their honeymoon as our wedding gift?” My mom thought it seemed like she was a little annoyed that she hadn’t received a thank you note. But I am very, very confused because i was very thorough with our thank yous and I know we didn’t receive a gift from them. I double checked our honeyfund just to be extra sure, and they’re not the ones who gifted us swimming with dolphins, it was someone else.

Has this ever happened to any of you...? How do you handle it? Just awkwardly tell them “no, sorry but we didn’t receive your gift”......? I feel like that seems gift-grabby but also like I said I didn’t expect them to get us anything to begin with, but I don’t want them thinking I’m rude for not having sent a thank you card!

8 Comments

Latest activity by Judith, on February 18, 2020 at 2:10 PM
  • E
    Devoted July 2021
    Emily ·
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    I would let them know you did not receive it because they clearly spent money on something that was never received and they should be given the opportunity to reach out to the company and try to get their money back if possible.
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  • Samantha
    VIP October 2020
    Samantha ·
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    I agree with Emily. You should just say that you never received it. I don't think it seems gift-grabby, you're just correcting a misunderstanding.

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  • Rebelle Fleur
    Master July 2021
    Rebelle Fleur ·
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    They may have contributed to the wrong honeymoon fund. That happened to me with my baby shower. A friend sent a gift to the wrong person. I’d call them personally to thank them and tell them I’m sorry I didn’t receive your gift or you would have definitely received a personal thank you from my husband and I.
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  • Suzie
    Super October 2021
    Suzie ·
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    What Emily said. They must have purchased something that went elsewhere.

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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    I'm with the others, I would just let them know that you never received it.

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  • Kelsi
    Expert June 2020
    Kelsi ·
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    Personally, since your mom had the conversation, I would actually have her let them know you didn't receive it but have your mom encourage her to reach out to you if she has further questions. I absolutely hate when I mention something to someone and someone else addresses it. I feel like I'm being attacked (but I am a super sensitive person)

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  • Kaysey
    Super February 2020
    Kaysey ·
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    I agree with Emily and Kelsi. Let them know that you did not receive the gift from them. Have your mom tell them and have them reach out to you. Once they contact you, explain to them that you were gifted that from another family and tell them to contact where they purchased from to see what was going on. It may be an awkward situation but you have to help them get to the bottom of it so they can get their money back.

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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    I agree! If two people gave money for that, and you did not get the surplus money, the givers should get a refund, with no fees charged against that gift, and an apology from the company.
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