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Just Said Yes December 2019

Destination wedding/family problems

Alexis, on November 30, 2018 at 9:31 PM Posted in Planning 0 5

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So I am getting married in Jamaica next December, 2019. We are very excited about this along with the majority of those that I have told. However, my parents got divorced this year and my mother and the rest of her family have told me that they will not be attending because they don't want to be around my dad.

Yes, it is very difficult to understand how a mother and other family members could do this to her only daughter... but the real problem for me is how to plan a wedding without my mom. And even, whether or not to involve her at all.

Also, I am getting close to sending out save the dates. Do I still send them STD's and invites even though they have declined or save my time and resources since they so rudely are making this about them?

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5 Comments

Latest activity by Alexis, on December 4, 2018 at 1:15 PM

Devoted December 2018
Sarah · on November 30, 2018 at 10:14 PM
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I would send them a save the date. My parents went though a messy divorce after 30 years of marriage while I was engaged and both threatened several times not to come because of the other one.

The divorce got finalized and my wedding is next week, both are coming. A lot can happen in a year and they may surprise you.
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Just Said Yes December 2019
Alexis · on November 30, 2018 at 10:17 PM
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Thanks for that🙂 You’re right. It really could turn around out later on.
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Master December 2019
Alyssa · on December 1, 2018 at 4:36 PM
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I would definitely still send them unless you want them clearly “not invited”

people say crazy things but most will put their kids first when push comes to shove, in my opinion

i hope that it is an angry situation that will cool a bit over the next year and you will have a perfect day with everyone there

we are getting married December 2, what day is your wedding? Do you have a theme?
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Champion October 2025
Jayla · on December 4, 2018 at 12:05 PM
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Hi Alexis!! I'm sorry to hear that you're having trouble with your family. Your wedding is a very special day and it's totally understandable that you would want both of your parents there. I agree with what the others said. I think it's a very smart and mature move to still send them an invite and save the date. You never know what could happen to their relationship over the next year leading up to your wedding, they may be able to be cordial. At the end of the day, if you do send them, you'll know that you did your part and it'll totally be up to them at that point! I have dealt with similar situations and knowing that I at least tried makes me feel so much better
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Just Said Yes December 2019
Alexis · on December 4, 2018 at 1:15 PM
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Thank you all for your help. Part of me (most of me) wants to say then screw you and if you don’t care about me why should I even make the effort? It’s been a long road of lies and manipulation that has brought me to this question. But I do agree with all of you that I really should just make the mature move here and if they still don’t come then they will be the ones who regret this for the rest of their lives.. not me. Thank yall for your help!
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