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Just Said Yes May 2020

Destination Wedding rsvp

Ashley, on November 5, 2019 at 7:07 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 8

Hi! I will be having a DW in Montego Bay, Jamaica May 26, 2020. I am a planner and am struggling with decisions as we have a number of items that need to be decided based on total numbers and are having a difficult time with our budgeting until we have a final count. Our package for our venue only includes 20 people so we pay per person over that (we invited 160). We already have an about 40 going and 40 not going guaranteed, but there is still about 80 guest we don't know where they will fall.

We did a wedding preview two weeks ago and our wedding planner referenced our next payment (50% of our budget) it due 5 month's before (Jan 26th) which will be largely based on guest count. She suggested it might be best to have the RSVP date right before. The count can still change until 45 days ahead, but there is no way I can wait to make decision until then. Our location options for reception, cocktail hour and reception depend on the number of people. and again, it is hard to plan decor and other items when we don't know if we are reserving the right spaces. I am happy to be flexible if guest need a bit more time (extended rsvp), but 80 unknown is a lot of question.

DW Brides, please let me know what you have found to have success with?! Is there really too early for DW RSVP? Any insights? Thanks!

8 Comments

Latest activity by MontelongoMagic**, on November 8, 2019 at 1:03 PM
  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    I think 5 months is really early and you run the risk of people either not RSVPing or changing their rsvp after the fact. We had friends who had a DW this past January with an RSVP date in November and they still wound up having to track a ton of people down and had people changing/canceling their plans up to a month before the wedding.
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  • A
    Just Said Yes May 2020
    Ashley ·
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    I realize; I clearly can’t do math as 5 months would be Dec 26 so Jan 20th would actually be just before 4 months out.

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  • A
    Beginner June 2024
    Alison ·
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    I read an article that was mistakes people make with weddings.

    It quotes a destination wedding planner (Sandy Malone) saying invitations and RSVPs have a different timeline than a standard wedding. STDs should be sent up to 18 months out from the big day, invites a year out and RSVPs to have deadline of 8 weeks after you mail them.


    I screenshot this as I plan on having a destination wedding so it's important to know.

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  • Jill
    Jill ·
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    This is absoultely horrible advice. There 's no way I would be able to say yes or no to a wedding a year out as PTO for the next year is not released that early. So much can change in 8 months. Someone says yes they will be there but then they get a new job and their PTO request is not approved. Do not do this!

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  • A
    Just Said Yes May 2020
    Ashley ·
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    Thank you for your comment and input. I do agree a year is too far out to ask for RSVP's. I would only be asking for 4 month's (I did the calculation wrong for my original post) which is only a month further out beyond the recommended 3 months for DW. I feel like at 4 month's out you should have an idea if you are going to be traveling out of the country or not. I sent STD's out a year in advance so people could start to be prepared.

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  • Jill
    Jill ·
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    4 months out I think is good. By then, most people will already have their flights and hotels booked especially with the STD's going out a year in advance.


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  • A
    Beginner June 2024
    Alison ·
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    I just wrote what I read...but then I read another article stating 12 weeks so who knows...


    I guess STD's will let them know destination wedding if you list the location on them so they know to arrange passports, flights and hotels for around then.

    We are only inviting family to our wedding and they already know its few years away and it will be overseas so they can book prior to getting an invite (although they'll probably get my help with itinerarys as I have experience with Disney vacations).

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  • MontelongoMagic**
    Savvy March 2021
    MontelongoMagic** ·
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    Following for insight, doing our DW in Cancun in March of 2021. I sent out the STDs at the 18 month mark but like you, a lot of things are contingent on how many people show up, even down to how many favors to get.. I know for me deadline for booking at the resort on our block of rooms in 60 days out so I'm hoping I will have final numbers well before then. Good Luck!

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