Cutting the Guest List

Maybe you can first ask people would they still feel comfortable coming to the wedding with COVID happening. You may get some honest people who won't feel comfortable (people who are elderly or high risk). You can see if that will help any!

I agree with Jasmine, speak with your VIPS that you want there to help with the process of elimination before jumping ship to the list.

I would absolutely not invite all 225 people hoping 75 of them opt not to attend. I'd just reach out to the 75 that are being cut and say "Unfortunately our venue is requiring us to reduce our guest list due to Covid and social distancing requirements, so we are prioritizing inviting our families and closest friends (or whatever makes sense depending on the person receiving this news). We would love to celebrate with you at another time." Then if you have space left open as people RSVP, you can reach out to those guests and say "We have more space than we thought we would and would love if you could join us for our big day as we originally intended." Because this is a pandemic situation, I think people would understand.

Always prepare for 100% attendance. But if you are required to cut the guest list due to venue restrictions, then you have to decide who to cut and who to keep. If the venue allows 50 (the states themselves make the regulation) then you choose 50 to invite or postpone.


Before you make your decision, ask closest family if they feel comfortable attending.
Some people choose to invite relatives only because of blood relations even though they may spend more time with close friends, and choose to cut friends first from the list instead of 'obligated' parents' friends, etc. Make a list of the permitted number and ask yourself if you can't imagine spending the day without them.
Please do not B list anyone by adding them on after someone else declines.

I cut my list based on who I talk to and who would make my day to see. Like you I have people coming from out of different states but we are still planning invited 150 and roughly 35 declines so it worked for me! Good luck

Make a A list send those invites out first for each decline send an invite to someone from your B list

I would defiantly reach out to those who would be more towards not coming due to COVID. And totally have an A and B list. My sister had a B list, and when 30 people RSVP'd that they couldn't come she was able to resort to her B list right away and made herself and others very happy.

View Quoted Comment I agree with Kari - though one change I would suggest making from Kari's wording is to use "wedding party" instead of "closest friends". Some people who you send it to may have thought they were considered a close friend. I think most people would be understanding, since everyone knows that gathering sizes are being limited everywhere. I would also suggest making a list of those who you really want at your wedding and finding a way to make sure they end up on the invite list.

I went from 130 to 50. I just made a list of my closest family and bestest friends and only included them.

Our list was originally 130, and our venue can now hold a maximum of 90 with the new guidelines. Instead of trying to decide who to cut and pushing things to the limit, we decided to start over.

Our plan B, that we're currently going forward with, is about 30-40 people -- made up of immediate, local family and the wedding party. We thought that was the fairest decision for our group.

I am planning to cut my list of 235 down to around 100 I am cutting the following:
Parent’s friends who I was not close with growing up.
Co-workers +1’s for people who are not married/engaged unless my fiancé and I are friends with both people in the couple.Friends that live far away that probably wouldn’t come anyway. This got my list to 130 but that includes out of state and older family who I doubt will attend.I honestly don’t care about hurting anyone’s feelings at this point. I want to have my wedding on my original date and this is how it has to be done. I doubt I’ll miss any of the people who don’t attend anyway! 2020 = no rules, Good luck!

My only advice is not banking on declines. I honestly thought more people would decline after we cut from 150 to 100, but if the remaining handful of people say yes we may be looking at 90 people. I was honestly hoping for more like 50, just to reduce the overall risk, but I guess this is what it is.
Good luck, believe me I know it's tough.

I am in a similar situation! We texted the people we were relatively close to and asked about their odds of coming. Unfortunately ALL Of them said they were still planning on coming 🤦🏽‍♀️ So we are in the process of cutting people right now but offering them a live stream. We’re still sending the uninvited people a live stream invitation so they still feel special.
My main advice is to uninvite ASAP! There were a couple people I didn’t reach out to because I was too lazy, and they randomly reached out to me and told me they were attending before I could cut them, which led to an awkward conversation lol.

We sent out a Google form to gauge people's feelings about reducing the number of guests, postponing, or keeping things as is. Most said they would prefer if guest list was reduced or we postponed. Based on that (and discussions with immediate family/VIPs), we sent out an email to everyone a couple weeks later that we had decided to move forward with our original plan with a reduced guest list, and that there would be a livestream of the ceremony available to everyone. Since we had only sent out save-the-dates and not invitations, most people who weren't immediate family assumed they were no longer invited - only those who received formal invitations were invited (a pleasant surprise to most!) No one has had hard feelings and we've received many messages of support.
We cut from 100 to 65, which was tough since our list was on the smaller side originally anyway.

I agree with yasmine you should call around and double check with guest to see if they are still comfortable coming because of covid 19. Explain to them that the venue is making you guys cut the guest list. you can maybe count on about 10-15 people not showing but not 75.