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Haleigh
Beginner May 2022

Courthouse then a wedding

Haleigh, on October 9, 2020 at 6:15 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 7
I know a lot of people are in the same boat as I am and getting legally married then having their big ceremony and reception on a later date. That being said how are you going about wording it in invites?
Are you treating it like your wedding day aka first dance, cake cutting, having the DJ announce the mr and mrs for the first time?
Are you worried at all about the wedding not feeling like the wedding day you dreamt of?

7 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on October 9, 2020 at 1:31 PM
  • Anna
    VIP October 2020
    Anna ·
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    So this wasn’t me, but even preCOVID, I know of two couples who did this, one because of military housing, the other for family health reasons. They still had a larger planned ceremony and did everything at the ceremony and reception that they’d have done anyway.


    I’m glad it’s working out that I can just have everything now. I was worried that we’d have to scale things down. But deciding between having a bigger vow renewal to still have the dream wedding or just a larger reception later on.
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    You can 100% still have all the elements of a traditional wedding. I would just make sure guests know that you are already married and maybe call it a vow renewal or celebration of marriage.
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  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
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    I never gave weddings much thought until my FH asked me to be his wife. You have to really evaluate if the typical wedding is really your dream or the societal expectation pushed upon you that you feel pressured to follow through.
    My FH and I came to terms that the 100 guest wedding was not what we wanted. So, we'll be marrying legally, just the two of us then we will celebrate with immediate family and very close friends by going out for brunch or something.

    Even though stereotypical weddings weren't for me, I absolutely love looking at pics of wedding gowns, decor, floral, etc.
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  • Haleigh
    Beginner May 2022
    Haleigh ·
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    Do you remember how the worded everything? Like did they do the first dance and all of it? Possibly the invites too?
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  • Anna
    VIP October 2020
    Anna ·
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    So the one I attended was the one who married because of military housing and their church ceremony wasn’t long after the courthouse ceremony, so nothing was really worded differently. For the one who was family, I didn’t know them at the time, but it was done as a vow renewal and reception. But they still did a first dance, etc.
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  • Victoria
    Devoted June 2021
    Victoria ·
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    My sister recently went to the courthouse to get married. Her ceremony was less than 2 minutes and she is planning on having another little ceremony and reception at a later date. Honestly, I feel like having another wedding is a great idea! I believe it's all what you make it.

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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    Many people do this - some right before the wedding so they can have a person of their choice officiate without having to worry about them being legally able to perform the marriage. If you do a legal ceremony shortly before the wedding for convenience, I don't think there is any reason to do the wedding any differently. If there is a significant amount of time between them and your legal ceremony is more of a celebration, where you dress up and have guests, etc then maybe you could treat the later event differently, but honestly it is completely up to you.

    We had a Covid elopement and are hoping do a bigger event next year. I still haven't figured out what the differences will be but we want the event with our friends and family to feel as much like a wedding as possible. We'll probably change the vows and do something other than a ring exchange, but most of the other details will be there I hope.

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