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Mary
Devoted November 2019

Correlation between money spent on wedding and divorce

Mary, on June 21, 2019 at 1:19 PM Posted in Community Conversations 1 39

I recently read a study that couples who spent $20,000 or more on their wedding were more likely to get divorced compared to those who spent between $5,000 to $10,000. They also saw that couples who spent less $1,000 got divorced significantly less. I'll share links to the study but what's your opinion? Do you think this is true? If you spent a larger amount, you will be less happy in your marriage?

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2501480

https://www.cnn.com/2014/10/13/living/wedding-expenses-study/index.html


39 Comments

Latest activity by Alison, on April 28, 2022 at 3:57 PM
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Debatable. Out of our friend groups, the ones that are divorced/separated are the ones that did courthouse ceremonies or quickly planned DIY cheaper weddings. The ones that had larger weddings and planned for longer, are still together. I can't imagine the cost you spend on a wedding has much to do with your marriage in general. I guess if the couple goes into debt for the wedding, that can cause additional stress on the marriage? In my experience, this is backwards.

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  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    My opinion is that if you go into debt to pay for the wedding, that financial burden could cause marital strain. I don’t think it’s about the dollar amount, but more about what financial position it puts you in once the wedding is over. I know people who spent $100 to get married and wound up divorced and I know people who spent $100,000 and have been married for a decade or more.
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  • Mary
    Devoted November 2019
    Mary ·
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    I didn't think about the effect debt would have. That's a good point!

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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    This is super interesting, I definitely believe there is a correlation but I don't think it is a cause and effect relationship. I think the correlation is just that people who would spend $20k+ on a wedding are (in general) more materialistic and extravagant than people who would spend less than $1k. Not making a generalization about ALL people of course, but I think we can agree there is probably a correlation there. People who would have a $1k or less wedding are (again, in general) people who probably depend less on material things for happiness, and are more likely to be happy with what they have (including their partner, and their marital life). Generally people who are extravagant people by nature, are less satisfied with their lives overall.

    Of course, this is NOT to say that "if you have a $40k wedding you are materialistic and unsatisfied with your life" haha, I am just saying more likely than someone who spent $1k. So the correlation makes sense.

    Also depends where you live and what your income is. To someone with a 6-figure salary in a place like California or something where everything is more expensive, spending $50k on a wedding really may not be THAT extravagant, in their situation rather than someone with less money in a lower-cost area.

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  • Nemo
    Master August 2018
    Nemo ·
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    My only friend that is divorced got married in a park with 6 guests in attendance. I agree with Sarah, I think it is more about the financial burden than anything else. Correlation does not equal causation Smiley winking I wouldn't take this at face value. there are a lot factors that play into this.

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    That's what I was trying to say for sure. I'd say your financial stability at home post-wedding (and how the wedding changed/affected that) has more affect than the true cost.

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  • Mary
    Devoted November 2019
    Mary ·
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    That's what I was thinking too! Different personalities for different choices

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  • Kelly
    Champion October 2018
    Kelly ·
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    In my friend group the ones that didn’t make it are the ones who had super small low budget weddings 🤷🏼‍♀️
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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    This makes sense, I also feel like based on this logic (that financial strain causes marital strain) you could also make an argument for the opposite of the article in some situations... if people spend less money on their wedding it may mean they HAVE less money in general and then would experience financial burden (not because of the wedding, but in correlation with people who may have less expensive weddings).

    I do feel like saying there's a correlation with percent of your income that you spend on a wedding, rather than saying there's a correlation with dollar amount spent on the wedding, would probably be more accurate.

    Though then you have people who's parents may give them a ton of money for the wedding and could have a $100k event without spending a penny of their own. It's all very situational Smiley tongue

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  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
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    I think there's a lot of factors that go into a divorce and money is a big one. Clearly outstanding debts put strain on a relationship and I'd guess couple's who spent more money on a large wedding probably have a hard time compromising and managing money which are big skills for a marriage.
    I've also seen studies showing couple's who marry younger get divorced at higher rates, which probably doesn't have so much to do with age rather than interpersonal skills lacking to manage a marriage properly.
    All in all many actions tend to lead up to divorce not just one.
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  • Nikita
    VIP April 2019
    Nikita ·
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    The correlation could mean a lot of things. I'd want to know a lot of the between-group demographics. For instance, were the age ranges about equal per group? How about income range, years together, living together, etc. Each of these demographics could actually change the statistic if not controlled for properly...


    sorry, public health stat nerd just got started,,, *goes to sit in a corner now*


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  • Mary
    Devoted November 2019
    Mary ·
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    All of that info is available in the first link. I had the same questions so I went straight to the actual study lol I am a public health stat nerd as well

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  • Nikita
    VIP April 2019
    Nikita ·
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    I couldn't actually get into the main paper - only the article describing it. They wanted me to sign-up for SSRN.

    But glad to find another stat nerd here! How were their controls?

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  • Iva
    Super September 2019
    Iva ·
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    I read that study too & it’s interesting to think about it. There is another study that shows that couples who had more people at their wedding are less likely to divorce than those with very small weddings (something to do with family/community support of the relationship).

    I firmly believe that the 1st study has to be adjusted for:
    - Area where you live (we’re in NYC & for $1000 you can’t even have a courthouse wedding with the cheapest possible photographer & a lunch for like 10 people afterwards 😂)
    - Couple’s yearly income - if a couple earns $250,000/year & spends $50,000 on wedding, they are spending 20% of their yearly budget. While a couple who makes $50,000/year & spends $50,000 for wedding is wasting 100% of their yearly income on a wedding! This will put 2nd couple in financial hardship & we know that finances are no. 1 reason couples argue & split over. It also means that 2nd couple is just not financially smart & doesn’t have their priorities in order - all factors that contribute to higher marital issues & divorce rates in general. However, the 1st couple can comfortably afford their $50,000 wedding & won’t face any issues of the 2nd couple. So it’s percentage of your yearly income you spend that matters & not the exact number.

    Lastly, people who spend $100-$1000 on a wedding are either people who just don’t care about materialistic possessions, or often people who don’t have a lot of money. Research shows that people who struggle financially are more likely to stay married (even if unhappy) because getting divorced is just plain expensive. It’s always cheaper to live & raise kids as a couple, then it is to do it in 2 separate households. People who are well off on the other hand will be more likely to cut the ties if marriage is unhappy, because they know they will be fine financially.

    I think the most important conclusion from the study is that spending more on a wedding will NOT make your marriage any happier (just as it’s the case for anything else materialistic in life).
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  • Mary
    Devoted November 2019
    Mary ·
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    Here's a few quotes from the paper on their samples!

    "Our study’s target population is adult US residents who have ever been married to someone of the opposite sex and are not widowed. Data collection involved implementation of a survey questionnaire. The questionnaire contained approximately 40 questions and covered topics pertaining to a person’s current marriage or first marriage (if divorced or married more than once). Specifically, we gathered information on marital status, marriage duration, children, length of time dated, feelings and attitudes at the time of wedding proposal, honeymoon, engagement ring expenses, wedding attendance, total wedding expenses, age, age at marriage, gender, race/ethnicity, education, employment, household income, region of residence, religious attendance, and differences in age, race, and education between respondent and partner. "

    "We excluded respondents who had a non-US IP address, reported having a same-sex marriage, reported an age at marriage of less than 13 years old, or were above age 60. We also excluded respondents who finished the survey in less than 2 minutes and provided inconsistent responses about age of partner, which was asked at the beginning and end of the questionnaire. After these filters, the final sample consisted of 3,151 respondents."

    "In particular, the distributions of marital status, gender, employment, and region of residence are nearly identical in our survey and the ACS. However, some notable differences in age, race/ethnicity, education, and household income exist between the two samples. Relative to the ACS, our sample is younger, whiter, more educated, and less wealthy. This raises the issue that the sample may not be fully representative of the US population of ever-married persons. For this reason, we will run regressions with population weighting."

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  • Shannon
    Expert June 2021
    Shannon ·
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    I'm wondering if it's the couples who put more effort into their weddings than their actual marriages who make those statistics. It would make sense.

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  • Mary
    Devoted November 2019
    Mary ·
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    That's also a good point! They cared more about the celebration than the relationship

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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    Spending more money on your wedding does not cause a divorce. . . Ridiculous.
    But people who spend more in proportion to their income, may have a higher rate of spending money on luxuries, resulting in less savings, less real property owned debt free, thus more often going into debt. . . And if those who spend more, are often people who care a great deal for the opinions of others on their appearance, and spend significantly more on clothing, HMU services, transportation by limo, and photography and video services, and flowers, really showing off for others now and when pics are viewed in the future, many of those people may also pay a disproportionate part of their income on fancy clothes, fancy cars, expensive vacations in regular times after the wedding. People who do not budget well, or spend too much income on certain keeping-up-with-the-Joneses things, have a historically higher rate of divorce due to money problems, and also are likely to get in to higher work hour schedules, working 60-70 hour weeks regularly, to pay for their lifestyle. Only to find that after a few years of spending little time together, and being tired, grumpy, uncommunicative when they are together, they have list their friendship, their sex life, their basic live for each other. . . The type of people who spend more than they can afford on their wedding, may also fall into debt and out of love more easily for these other reasons. But is the common behaviors of bad budgeting, prioritizing things they cannot afford, then always working to pay off the past, that would likely be responsible for the correlation, high spending on wedding, more likely to divorce.
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  • MrsJohansson
    Expert June 2019
    MrsJohansson ·
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    Well hot damn, guess we are good then! This is interesting though, I think debt is more of an issue over all.


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  • Nikita
    VIP April 2019
    Nikita ·
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    Thank you so much! That's great to see. The other thing I'd want to know is an overall life happiness rating at marriage compared to life-happiness at the time of the survey.

    If the life-happiness is roughly the same, the reason may be something along the lines of higher income having easier access to leave a marriage that goes wrong... and lower money spent could mean that couples don't really feel the 'weight of investment.' So when the marriage starts to go sour, it may take longer and/or be too difficult to untangle - so 'middle of the road' couples stay together longer.

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