Confusion about the elope now, reception later deal...

Personally I just don't get the point if you are having a reception anyway. I am not trying to judge, I think you should do whatever you and your FH want. Nobody else has to understand it or like it, it's your life.

But personally I feel like "elopement" is when you and your FH (and maybe a few others) go away, get married, return and say SURPRISE! And then that's it. You go back to your life. If you have a ceremony, no matter how small, and then a reception, in my mind that is a wedding. Reception = wedding. Big fat effin wedding. lol

Anyway I did just picture in my mind a beautiful small ceremony in the Sierra Nevada mountains and what awesome photos that would make. So it sounds lovely

I don't think it counts as eloping if your family goes with you. I don't see anything wrong with having a reception the next day if that's what you want to do, but I'm no etiquette expert. Do what makes you happy!

Well to be honest, the reason we got to this point is because of our budget. We found an absolutely beautiful venue, but it's a bit out of our budget and deep down we want to get married in the woods. So we were thinking of getting our actual dream wedding for the ceremony and then having our family/friends celebrate with us when we get back.

And girls, you're going to have to excuse me. I'm new to all this, so I'm sure I'm confusing and confused!

I think that sounds lovely.

That sounds beautiful! I say do it.

If you want to have a small, intimate ceremony with family only, you can certainly do that. Later, you can send out invitations to a reception celebrating your marriage. All you'd have to do is send out invitations like this:

Together with their families,

Mr. and Mrs. Janet,

cordially invite you

to a reception celebrating their

April 16, 2016 marriage.

Then just give the date, time, and location. It's fine to have an intimate/family only ceremony and celebrate with a larger crowd later.

I say do what feels right. Get married where and when you want and throw a celebration later to share with friends and family. My FH and I are considering the same (but it's been hard!)

Thank you ladies (and/or gents) for helping! @The Centerpiece Flowers- that sounds like a great idea.

I will definitely update you guys as to what we're planning on doing! And I might ask for more help. Lol.

@Krystyna- please share details about what you guys are planning!

I say go for it! We are having a small family ceremony, due to my severe anxiety. The ceremony will be on a Wednesday, and we will have the reception that Saturday for all of our friends and family! and your location sounds beautiful! =)

Janet, we are currently planning a small wedding in Santa Barbara for our tenth anniversary. Like, very small. Parents and siblings and our two closest friends. Since our anniversary is on a Tuesday, we will go to Santa Barbara on Monday, get married on Tuesday at the Santa Barbara courthouse with a few people and go out for dinner and drinks after. That's the current plan. The original plan was to elope to Yosemite, just him and I, but we have family forty minutes from there and my mama would be heartbroken if she wasn't there for her only child's ceremony .. and if my mama goes, his mama wants to go, and we all know how that snowballs .. so we are compromising on our next favorite place. Getting married intimately in the woods is so romantic. We are also thinking of throwing a celebration party a few months after the wedding to celebrate with the whole family.

We do plenty of weddings this way and frankly, I don't think it matters what you call it. We tend to think of our elopements at 10 people or under, but many of our couples do a big party afterwards.

If you're going to do this (and it sounds lovely), keep the initial wedding very, very small; THAT makes sense. Then send out an invite to "celebrate our wedding!"

I'm not sure this counts as eloping. We talked about doing this and then having an open house after where people could visit have a bite to eat and offer their congratulations without the request of gifts. I would personally feel bad about not inviting people to share in our special moment and then asking for a gift at a reception type event. That's just me.

I'm not sure this counts as eloping. We talked about doing this and then having an open house after where people could visit have a bite to eat and offer their congratulations without the request of gifts. I would personally feel bad about not inviting people to share in our special moment and then asking for a gift at a reception type event. That's just me.

E·lope əˈlōp/ verb: run away secretly in order to get married, especially without parental consent.

This sounds like a small destination wedding, and it sounds great! Do a big party the next day. Celia had good advice, as always!

We're doing this. Our parents (and a few friends who live there) are coming to the Oregon coast with us. We're getting married on the beach. And for the record, I call it an elopement. We canceled our big wedding and doing this instead. We are having a party the following weekend at our home.

This is similar to what we did, but we had our reception the same day. We had a very short civil ceremony with only the wedding party present at a swanky hotel, then had a big reception in our hometown that night. I know some people thought it was weird, but it worked for us.

We are doing our wedding a little different also. We decided to get married at the JOP this past September 12th, and we are having our wedding ceremony this coming Sept 12th on our anniversary. This is because his family is so far away from us, and economically it made more sense for us to do it this way. At first, I thought people would think it was strange, but it works for us, and we have received nothing but support!! I say, do whatever works for you!!

Go for it! Especially since you're planning the party a completely different day, I don't see any giant etiquette mistake. Where in the Sierra Nevadas? I grew up in a little town outside of Tahoe, your ceremony will be beautiful!

Ps. So close to being a date twin! Yay!

That sounds wonderful. May I ask why you want to? Just curious as to your reasons.

For your question, it is a intimate mini DW. I think that is acceptable. It is like a family only ceremony with a reception afterwards. Just word your reception invites right.