Civil wedding before "big" wedding?

I don't this there is any "trend" here...people do it for legitimate reasons.

Yeah, I agree. This isn't a "trend." It's just something that a lot of people HAVE to do. They don't always plan on it, but it happens. Does all this make sense, OP? I think people also just want to celebrate with family - ain't nothing wrong with that

MizizAngi...You took the words right from my fingertips!

Well actually there was a person on here who sounded like they wanted to do it for no reason at all.That was a little off.

^ I do remember that girl. But, honestly, you don't really need a reason. If someone is making you justify it to attend your wedding, they aren't very worthy of receiving an invitation in the first place.

You know, people like Michelle.

We got married in civil court 6-3-13 after dating 4 1/2 years because of legal reasons, mostly so I could get my US residency. We had our big wedding a year later with friends and family and everyone already knew we were married which did not matter to anyone. Many said it was the best wedding they had ever been to. Our ceremony was purely secular and what matter most to us was that everyone we loved was there. We consider our 6-6-2014 as our anniversary date because it felt more real to us. Honestly I'm glad we did this, I got health insurance and a drivers license sooner than if I had waited till our big wedding.

Thanks everyone! It makes a lot of sense now. I think part of it was because I saw a post and it was like one in the morning and I couldn't wrap my head around it! I don't think that there is anything wrong with it, and it especially makes sense depending on the situation.

But also like sunshinejenn said, you don't have to have a reason, and I get that too, I was just curious

For those having a civil ceremony at the courthouse, you don't have to exchange vows or rings. You can save the vow & ring exchanges for your later ceremony (to make that one feel "more real").

Florida has a 3-day waiting period for residents, but not for non-residents.

As for the military question, I know a couple who got married in an elopement ceremony because he was being sent to Japan and found out last minute they had to be married in order for him to be put in 'married housing'. He flew back for the family celebration a few months later. Everyone knew the situation and that they were already married, and was happy to celebrate with them.

I just found out 2 days ago that we have to do it this way because FFIL got ordained to marry us...it's legally binding in the county we live in, but not in the county we're getting married in (we live about .5 miles from the county line.) So instead we will get married at the courthouse in the county we live in that morning, just a few hours before we travel to the other county for our ceremony.

I'm not telling anyone other than those who need to know and I honestly don't consider it to be lying. It's just the way of getting around the legalities.

We did this for our own edification. Neither of us were comfortable living together before we got married (even though we did) we wanted to be a good example to our kids. Plus all our wedding plans went out the door when we found mold in our kitchen. We decided to do a private ceremony with just us and our pastor. We exchanged vows and rings with Gary our pastor and God as our witnesses and we will sign the certificate on our "wedding day." So technically by the state we are not considered married yet

Here is a perfect example. I have a couple coming here to get married soon. They made an appointment with the clerk for this week to get their license, which would satisfy their waiting period here, and all would be fine.

The clerks' office closed for an 'emergency' , and now they are faced with either taking two more days off before the wedding (unpaid) or getting married in their home state before hand.

What would you do? Guess what I told them?

Future Mrs. W, there's no way that would affect your guests in any way. Your wedding day would still be the same. And you have less than 2 weeks! Can't wait to see your BAM :-)

We had our civil wedding in 2012. Simply because we were planning a big wedding then found out we were pregnant and due December 2011. So instead of planning for a wedding we planned for our daughter haha. She's almost 3 now so we are back to planning.

One more reason some couples do it: a same-sex couple may not be able to get legally married in their home state. However, they may still want to have a ceremony in their home state, so that their friends and family can attend. So in some instances, they will have a short civil ceremony in a state that allows them to get married, then have a bigger ceremonial marriage back home.

We didn't do it that way. We had our legal marriage with just immediate family and a few close friends, then had a bigger party for friends back home. But I do understand the desire of some couples to have their wedding in the place where they live, even if that place doesn't allow for a legal marriage.

FH and I were going to do this given the extremely poor health of his grandmothers. It created insurmountable issues you have no idea. Ultimately, we decided to have a "normal" wedding next year and will not be having a private civil ceremony this year. Unfortunately, FH's grandmothers will not be still living by the time the wedding rolls around - it was a very sad truth that everyone had to just come to the realization.

Future Mrs. Whitaker, have your FFIL legally marry you in your county (where he can), and then unofficially do your planned ceremony in the neighboring county.

I guess I don't get the K-1 visa civil marriage with a huge wedding again later. One of our friends married a woman who came to the US from Europe. They had a civil courthouse marriage and that was it. They were young, barely out of college, and living on next to nothing and didn't have the time or the money for something more elaborate. They've been married almost 10 years now, and have two beautiful children together. I think the fact that they have a good marriage now is more important than the "dream" wedding they never had. They don't regret doing what they had to do at the time.

We were going to do it this way. We planned the wedding for NM, where he is from, so that his family could be there. But, civil marriage was not recognized in NM for same sex couples at the time we started planning. So, i reached out to my friend, the mayor of Los Angeles, and he agreed to do a small civil ceremony for us before we left for NM. Then, in December, it became legal in NM, and the mayor had a work trip planned about when the ceremony was going to be, so we just had the one,

View Quoted Comment Im trying to find out if there is a requirement for how far in advance the DR church requires the civil wedding be done if the couple chooses to do this first in their home country?