Church members want to attend wedding, but I can't afford a large reception

Don't just invite them to the ceremony or reception. Both or nothing. You may be better off explaining to them you need to keep the wedding small for x reason.

I'd like to help you but I can't understand your question. What do you mean by a public wedding but a private ceremony? The ceremony and reception are the wedding.

If you are having the ceremony at the church is it open to the public??? You may not be able to stop them from coming to the ceremony but make it very clear that the reception is invitation only. If people ask about the reception state that you venue is over capacity. Don't mention money...people will offer to pay.

This is about the only situation in which inviting people (as in the whole congregation) to the ceremony and not the reception is just fine, and those people will not expect to be invited to the reception. It happens all the time with church leaders and/or loyal members. No one is going to try and crash your reception.

A short cake and punch reception followed by a 'real' reception is nice, followed by your reception for your invited guests. And is not considered to be a tiered reception.

Thank you! this is very helpful. The wedding will be at the church and I don't mind people just showing up to that, I just can't have them show up to the reception too. The reception will be at a different location which only holds about 50 people. Wendy C, I really like your idea.

When my pastor got married the church members were allowed to attend. Sh didn't send out invites, it was just announced in church. Then afterwards she had cake and punch reception at the fellowship hall and it was also there she did her receiving line. Then she had a private reception with her family at a separate location. Pastors and religious leaders are usually in a pickle like this but most pastors i know have done it this way. I know its against WW but you have to deal with church politics that WW doesn't deal with.

My friend is the pastor's daughter at her church; there was no way they weren't inviting the entire church to their ceremony. However, there was also no way they could host that many people at the reception. They handed out invitations to everyone. The ones who were invited to the reception also got a card with reception information. to make it feel like the other guests weren't afterthoughts, everyone was invited to a coffee-and-cake dessert bar in the church foyer after the ceremony was done. She asked close friends of her to bring homemade cakes in lieu of gifts, and we had a blast. It was like a cake potluck. Since her friends made the cakes and served them, there was no additional expense to the bride and groom. Everyone who was asked to make a cake seemed very honoured to do so; we compared recipes and brought out some really killer varieties; there were little cards on all the tables describing the cake and saying who had made it. Everyone hung around for a few hours chatting and eating cake; the bride and groom got to thank everyone for coming to the ceremony, and still got to have a smaller private reception with a meal for their close family and friends. It didn't seem rude at all.