Church ceremony at home and a destination reception?

If your FMIL isn’t paying I would do what you want and not allow her to make demands and threats like that. That kind of behavior isn’t something that will stop after the wedding and now is a perfect time to practice setting boundaries.

No priest will marry you in a Catholic Church if you are not religious. And, if you are not religious, you probably wouldn't want that ceremony, anyway.

I would call her bluff and have the destination wedding you want. Don't let her control you two. You're not even Catholic so trying to force that on you is really not okay in my book.

Woof. If you aren't religious, it would be very difficult to get married in the Catholic church. Have your fiance talk to her about the type of wedding you both want to have and the reasons why. Let her know, you aren't trying to hurt her, but a Catholic wedding just isn't who you two are, and it would be disrespectful to pretend otherwise.

Also, your father is paying for the whole thing, yes? That means he gets a say in what happens in terms of the wedding. He may not be willing/able to pay for a wedding that is what she is envisioning. Another point for your fiance to make with her.

Also, no. You cannot have a wedding in TX and a reception in another country. The reception is a Thank You to those who attended your ceremony.

If you decide to do the religious wedding, do that and a reception and a honeymoon.

If you're not religious, getting married in a Catholic church is going to be difficult, if not impossible. As Kelly said, this is the time for you to set the standards on how your relationship with your FMIL will work going forward. If you allow her to have control over your wedding, that will put her in a position of power over other things in your marriage. If she's not contributing financially, she doesn't get to make the decisions. No pay, no say.

Etiquette wise, you would still be responsible for hosting a reception after the local ceremony. I would imagine many guests aren't going to travel for a destination reception when they've already witnessed the ceremony, you still need to thank those guests who cannot or do not want to travel for a reception.

You could do a small DW, and let your FMIL host (and pay for) a cake & punch reception later at her church hall and invite whomever she wants. But she should pay and do all the work. You both can just show up (in wedding attire or not). It may be because she wants a party to invite her church friends to. But like other people said, if you're not Catholic you might not be able to get married there anyway and your vows are sacred so say them wherever feels right to you & your fiance. I'm also not fond of your FMIL threatening to disown you both because you don't obey her threats; that's very manipulative and unkind but if true would be her loss. You & your fiance will soon be a family and your needs together come first.

It is possible we asked our priest about doing this same thing actually.
However, as others have said, you are not catholic and if your FH is not or nonpracticing you may not be able to get married in the church.

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Only one partner has to be religious. It just won't be a sacrament if one of them isn't baptized.