The Bride
Master March 2019

Cheating Or Not Cheating?

The Bride, on August 17, 2019 at 2:43 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 23
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BuzzFeed put out a questionnaire detailing several different scenarios and asked their readers to decide if the situation was cheating or not cheating.

Scenario 1: Your partner flirts with someone in person but doesn't physically do anything with them.

Scenario 2: Your partner goes for coffee with someone they like*.

Scenario 3: Your partner logs into a chat room and starts talking sexually with strangers.

Scenario 4: Your partner follows someone they like* on social media.

Scenario 5: Your partner downloads a dating app but doesn't meet anyone from it.

Scenario 6: Your partner gives their phone number to someone they like*.


Like*: Sexually attracted to, interested in having a relationship with, etc.



For each scenario state if describes cheating or not cheating in your marriage, then explain your answer.


Cheating Or Not Cheating? 1


23 Comments

Latest activity by Natalie, on December 20, 2020 at 10:12 PM
  • SraDeCarrillo
    Super August 2019
    SraDeCarrillo ·
    • Flag

    None of them are cheating but they are putting themselves in a position that is a slippery slope because the intent is there. So all of the above is unacceptable behavior in a committed relationship.

    • Reply
  • Grace
    Dedicated December 2019
    Grace ·
    • Flag
    That is all cheating. My partner shouldn't like or be interested in anyone sexually/romantically, period. Even without the actions being taken with the "liked" people, it's still emotional cheating.
    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
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    I see your point.
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  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Hmmmm...emotional cheating.... interesting perspective.
    • Reply
  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
    • Flag
    I don’t think any of them are cheating. I currently have two dating apps on my phone right now 🤣 My single friends like help and perspectives on potential dates.
    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Does your husband know your on dating apps?
    • Reply
  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
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    Yup. Sometimes he’ll help me sort out the “sub-text” in some people’s profile if they sound like they may be covertly pretentious or elitist.
    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you for clarifying.
    • Reply
  • Erin
    VIP December 2020
    Erin ·
    • Flag
    It’s all cheating. Intent is 9/10ths of the law. If he’s flirting and putting himself out there with people he’s “into” he’s cheating, plain and simple.
    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Can you explain "Intent is 9/10ths of the law"? I looked it up but can't find anything concrete.
    • Reply
  • Yam
    VIP September 2019
    Yam ·
    • Flag
    Those are all examples of emotional cheating to me(except the dating app since they didn’t meet anybody yet) and I wouldn’t be ok with any of it.
    To me emotional cheating is even worse than getting drunk and having a one night stand, I’m not ok with either but an emotional connection is what sparks actual relationships.
    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Hmmmm...you have a good point.
    • Reply
  • Dawn
    Savvy March 2020
    Dawn ·
    • Flag
    Scenario 1 is disrespectful and Scenarios 2-6 is cheating.
    • Reply
  • CourtneyBrittain
    Master August 2019
    CourtneyBrittain ·
    • Flag

    Scenario 1: Your partner flirts with someone in person but doesn't physically do anything with them.

    I would say not cheating with flirting. My husband has a very flirty personality and I know he's dedicated to me so it doesn't bother me.


    Scenario 2: Your partner goes for coffee with someone they like*.

    I wouldn't call this cheating but I would not be happy. We have a deal where we don't hang out one on one with someone of the opposite sex just to protect us. Neither of us is concerned about the other person, but this helps us and helps others not start rumors about us as well.

    Scenario 3: Your partner logs into a chat room and starts talking sexually with strangers.

    I would call this cheating. Sexually speaking with others is emotionally cheating in my book. We have talked about this and are in agreement.


    Scenario 4: Your partner follows someone they like* on social media.

    Not cheating. It's normal to have crushes or like someone but if he were to start messaging and flirting then I would be upset.


    Scenario 5: Your partner downloads a dating app but doesn't meet anyone from it.

    Not cheating but a definite stepping stone. Why do you need a dating app if you're not dating anymore? You're married to me, date me.


    Scenario 6: Your partner gives their phone number to someone they like*.

    Not cheating but a stepping stone. Why are you giving your number out?


    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
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    What makes scenario 1 disrespectful but not cheating?

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  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I appreciate the detail in your responses.

    I wouldn't consider scenarios 1, 2, 4, 5, 6 cheating either but I think they could be a gateway into cheating.

    Scenario 3 is definitely cheating, the only sexual interactions my partner should have is with me.


    • Reply
  • Dawn
    Savvy March 2020
    Dawn ·
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    I guess it just depends on the level of flirting. There’s harmless flirting and then there’s flirting with the intent of wanting more past flirting.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I'd definitely be upset at all of that. Emotional cheating.n
    • Reply
  • Nykole
    Expert October 2019
    Nykole ·
    • Flag
    Emotional cheating is still cheating in my opinion.


    • Reply
  • The Bride
    Master March 2019
    The Bride ·
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    Thank you for clarifying.

    • Reply

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