Ceremony timing

I'm starting mine on time. I noted on our website that our venue will open for seating at 3:30, with a ceremony start time of 4pm. All of our guests will be staying very close to the venue. If someone is running late, they will have to quietly enter during the ceremony. I don't think it's fair to the guests who show up early to have to wait longer.

This is going to be a long thread, just warning ya......

In my area, NJ/NYC, all my venues recommend a half hour buffer. During that time, they serve beverages, sometimes light hors, coffee in the morning. Guests can mingle, say their hellos, get settled and arrive at the ceremony ready to pay attention. (You're talking about a Friday too; Fridays in NJ are legendary in the trafic world. ) Ten minutes before the ceremony, the guests are shepherded to the ceremony space and we start on time. Cocktails start on time. Everyone is happy. (And I still see people arriving after we've started. Sometimes after we end....)

You can invite people for any time you want, but be prepared to start at the stated time no matter who is there unless you build in a buffer time. Because when you start late, that time will come out of your party.

That is primarily for the benefit of those who have not gotten their invites. For you?

Start on time.

Thank you D&T listing when the venue is open for guest is a good idea that I didn't think of.

Celia

I could definitely plan to serve some light foods and drinks while the guest wait I hadn't thought of that either so thank you. But I think you're right about just starting on time I just didn't know what was correct.

In my area, guests expect to be there on time and the ceremony is expected to start on time. That being said, I have been to a lot of ceremonies where they do start 10 minutes late or so and you can see all the guests checking their phones and watches for the time. It's a little irritating when you show up early and the event starts late!

Chelle

I agree I'm a very punctual person if I'm on time I feel late but I didn't know if it was expected or what.

I would start on time

I would be willing to give a 20 minutes buffer for stragglers and traffic problems

We started right on the time we put on the invite. Every single guest was there. Maybe its a know your crowd situation but every wedding we've been to has started on time and people usually arrive 10-15 mins prior to the time on the invite at a minimum. I wouldn't let traffic or any other excuse make me late for a business meeting or a hangout with friends, I (and almost everyone we know) give the same respect to weddings.

I will likely be starting 5-10 minutes past. My family is late to everything. I generally lie to them about what time things start so they show up on time, awful, I know

We're planning to start on time. I don't understand why people feel the need to accommodate other people's tardiness. If they're late, they're late. It's rude to the people who actually manage their time effectively and show up on time.

I put the time on my invitations 30min before we are actually scheduled and plan to walk to give people a chance to get there and settled. Now I just need to be on time!

We plan on starting on time. FH was in the military, so being on time is a huge thing for him n it just annoys me that society thinks it's OK to suggest hosts to start late to accommodate a few stragglers while those settled in on time, can sit longer. Just a pet peeve....

All the weddings I've been to, and that's a lot, never started on time all were started late.

In my area, guests know to arrive 10-15 min before the start time to get seated & settled.

I think it's really rude if a bride is more than 10 min late.

If I got to the wedding 15 minutes early, and then found out the couple had built in a 30 min buffer, I'd not be impressed.

I would be pissed with a 30 minute buffer since I also get places early. It's rude. And if you want an unplugged ceremony good luck, because your guests are going to have their phones still out when you finally walk down the aisle, because they're going to take them out about 3 minutes after the ceremony was supposed to start and probably not put them back away.

I plan to start my wedding MAX 5 minutes after the start time, and that 5 minutes is only if people and still actively coming in and sitting down. I'm not waiting around for anyone (except officiant and FH!).

I guess also this would be annoying because I sent save the dates 6 months out and our ceremony won't start until 530 on Saturday evening and will be less than 30 minutes, so I have no sympathy for anyone who can't plan around that. They should just join for the reception.

It just depends on where you're located. As Celia mentioned, in a metropolitan area, a downtown, or just any place where there is high traffic, it's the norm to have a 30 minute buffer. Even if you're a planner like me and leave early, shit can happen on the way. I'm in NYC, so it's almost unreasonable to expect every single person to be on time, with traffic and public transport delays, even if guests leave early. We're going to let guests know that there will be refreshments served before the ceremony. Everyone in my area knows about the buffer.

I guess it also depends on if your guests will have to travel far. Last month, FH and I drove 3 hours to a wedding and even though we left early, there was heavier than normal traffic and then there were 2 accidents on the way. We arrived on time, but we only had 30 minutes to check in the resort and get ready, as opposed to an hour. There was actually a 30 minute buffer, as everyone had to drive 2-3 hours, so the couple accommodated for any travel hiccups.

You gotta know your crowd I guess, but I'm definitely doing a 20 min buffer for stragglers and also for myself! Seems like there is always a mishap on the way to the church in the weddings I've been in. However, I do want to consider my guests who are early/on time so I wouldn't make them wait more than 20 mins.

It's a know your crowd, know your geography thing, but if you don't plan a buffer, be prepared to start on time no matter WHO is late (and don't make it you). And lie to your shuttles.

Oddly enough, I am never late. Between mapquest, WAZE and a dozen other traffic apps, there is really no excuse if people actually want to be there on time.

Celia

My fiancé swears by WAZE. I'm very rarely late and only under the direst circumstances. And my family is driving an hour and his is driving thirty minutes so they should be able to arrive on time without issue.

My wedding is just exactly three no stragglers if they're stragglers and that's on them.