Ceremony Start Time

No you can't put anything like that on the invites. They're adults, they'll either be on time or they won't.

Let adults be adults.

We put on our website under faqs: "What time will the ceremony start? Promptly at 2pm"

And left it at that.

If they're late, it's on them.

I think the only thing you could say is "ceremony to start at 4:00." But nothing addressed to guests about what they need to do. If they are late then they are late. But don't wait around on them, and of it's indoors hope that the door is quiet

You start your ceremony on time and if some guests miss part of it because they were late, that's on them.

Well, if adults actually acted like adults that would be fine, but that really doesn't happen.

You have three options. You can put a half hour early, have a half hour of sparkling water and wine and start at 4:00. Almost every venue we work in does this; it's not like they make them go over and sit in their little chairs for a half hour....it's a 'pre cocktail hour".

Or you can put "Four O'clock Sharp" on the invites. And/or, you can start at 4:00 no matter who is there.

You're also talking Memorial Day. If you're in an area with traffic (like the Jersey Shore....) and you have guests who aren't familiar with that particular ring of hell, a buffer is good.

Boy, if I had a dollar for every time we had a prompt, on the dot start with 100% of guests arriving on time for a Memorial Day weekend wedding...

...I'd have earned $0.00.

Your wedding planner can swear up and down it'll start at 4PM, but Murphy's Law is a very real thing, and you should always expect the unexpected to occur.

I like Celia's suggestion of putting the start time as half-an-hour earlier and having sparkling water and wine before the 4PM start.

That's all you can really do, other than starting at 4PM sharp, regardless of who is there.

Let adults be adults. If they're late, they're late; if they're not, they're not. You can't parent the world.

If I received an invitation that said the ceremony started at 3:30, I'd probably show up about 20 minutes ahead to ensure I can park and get a seat. I'd be annoyed if I found out the ceremony actually started at 4:00 and now I've got to wait for 50 minutes for the ceremony to start. This suggestion can work if you're having an outdoor wedding and as Celia suggested to have a pre-cocktail hour. If you're having a church wedding, I don't think this suggestion plays well.

We wanted the wedding to start at 4. We decided to put 3:45. That way we can have a 5 minute leeway then close the doors at 3:50 and not let anyone else in. Grandmothers/mothers will go down at 3:50 then bridal party then me at exactly 4.

Putting the actual time of the ceremony on the invite is fine if you're prepared to start at that time, no matter what. In most of our venues, their timing is very key to cocktail hour, to entree production, to coordinating with the other weddings, if there are more than one. You simply will not be able to wait because the shuttle is late (epidemic) or Aunt Mary couldn't find her other shoe.

We are starting to walk down the aisle at 3, and if anyone is late, they will be doing a walk of shame across the lawn where everyone can see that they are late. Adults should know to come a little early.

The invitations and website are already out as the wedding is in May (yes, memorial day weekend). It's a destination wedding and most of the guests are not familiar with the area. It is an outdoor wedding at a park.

Based on answers here, I will plan to start the ceremony as we've planned at 4pm and latecomers will hopefully not distract too much from the ceremony.

Thanks to everyone for your input!! I really appreciate all the opinions.

I'm always on time and I feel like I'd be annoyed if I showed up prior to the start time to find out that wasn't the real start time. I agree with letting adults be adults. Their fault if they're late.

I think it's common courtesy to start 5-15 minutes late so people have time to arrive and get settled. Most events (not just weddings) do this as standard practice.

You guys crack me up. As if adults were going to be adults. Same thing we say about cell phones, wearing appropriate clothing and not adding three other people to an RSVP that clearly says "2 guests).

I have never done a wedding, in almost 2000 of them, where everyone was in place and ready to start on time. As in never.

I don't think there's anything that's going to stop a human being from being late regardless if it's for a wedding , dental appt, work, etc. you can put a time on paper but doesn't ensure that it's going to go by schedule