Ceremony only, is this okay???

First of all ... YAY! Another AZ bride (and a diamondbacks fan at that)!

To get back to your question...could you possibly have a cake and punch reception? If you aren't familiar with those, they usually just involve cake and punch (no full dinner) to thank everyone for coming to the wedding. I would feel a little wierd going to a big ceremony and not going to a reception afterwards.

If you still can't swing that, then I don't see anything wrong with having a smaller wedding. Most people will understand (especially with today's economy) if you can't have the type of wedding you originally planned. Just be sure you send something to those you sent the STDs to so that they know not to make travel plans/arraingments. Don't know how I feel about going Dutch on the meal after the wedding. IMHO, I think you should just have the wedding you can afford. Good luck!

Thank you!!! And no, we cannot afford a cake and champagne reception either, the location we chose tacs on another $$$ for more time and to bring in vendors. We were planning to send out a letter to those we are "uninviting" if we are to go that route.

Not really sure how I feel about going dutch either, however, we would only be asking that of our immediate family - grandparents, parents, and siblings. I think if it were my sister in this situation, I would have no problem paying for my own meal. Of course, if it was my second cousin twice removed... I would opt out

Thanks again for the advice!

Have you considered changing your date so you can become a bit more financially stable? Have you put down a deposit? How about a very small ceremony and do a bbq style reception at a park (some place cheap or free) a little later down the road. Have close family pitch in with making food. I know in the end it is all about being married to the one you love, but it will be one of your most special days and should be shared with all that are close to you.

Yes, we have put our deposits down on everything except the caterer and a DJ. We have already waited 4 years, and for us to be where we need to be will take atleast another 3 years or so - and who knows, because anything could happen in the next 3 years. We're thinking the best option for us is the large ceremony w/ no reception. It will allow everyone we love to be there, and then maybe in 5 years we can have an anniversary reception.

I don't know what the bigger etiquette faux pas is, having a ceremony with no reception or uninviting guests. The bottom line is that you know your guests better than we do, how would the 150 ppl that you tell are no longer invited likely to react? Also how many of the 200 are going to think it's bad to have a ceremony but no reception? I'd take a poll of your close family members and see how they react. In the end you have to have the wedding you can afford, your friends and family will have to deal with it no matter which way you opt to go.

With the economy being the way it is, I have had a lot of brides with the same problem as you. Here is my suggestion:

Since you have not paid for a caterer, you could ask immediate family members if they could make a dish/finger food for your reception and make it an appetizer only reception. That would save you the cost of food.

And you don't need a DJ....a good stereo system & an iPod will do the job just fine!

If you do decide to go with a "ceremony only," just be sure that you note on the invitation something about this being a wedding ceremony only to avoid confusing. I am sure your friends & family will understand.

As far as uninviting people, most people will understand but just remember, you can't please everyone. So be prepared for some feedback from the guests who get that notification.

Hope that helps! If you need anything else, feel free to contact us at ***************@*****.***

Your Perfect Day.....because you deserve it

@konichiwa - thanks, but I have to agree with Your Perfect Day, yes it sucks to be uninvited and some people may be offended, but the majority of them (esp since they are ALL family) will understand. I am not too worried about the faux pas of uninviting in this instance.

@Your Perfect Day - we have actually considered both the appetizers and/or a potluck style reception, but it is not only the food (or the DJ) that would be throwing us over our budget limit.

I appreciate everyone's feedback, it has definitely helped us see things from other perspectives than our own. We are still weighing our options and taking any advice we can get!