ceremony and reception gap

Thanks for your suggestions, I don't know that I can avoid a gap altogether because we are having a religious ceremony and my fiance and I want an evening reception but I will try to make the gap smaller and maybe start cocktail an hour earlier. My fiance and I also wanted to have enough time to be at the cocktail hour for bit since we are having so many guests (250+), want to make sure I can get to greet everyone since I know the time goes by so fast during the party. I realize it is very difficult to accomplish all of these things and keep everyone happy. I also do not expect all guests to attend the ceremony, I would be happy to just see my family members and closest friends.

@FB99 Would you rather be rude or broke? Again, if I have it anywhere else, it would be exceedingly outside of our budget.

"I'm a photographer and 2 hours is about average on what I spend between the ceremony and reception start. I think you're fine with the time frame"

Hmm, a one-star with bad advice claiming to be a photographer. Yeah, sure.

Cristina, you're being rude unless you're paying for them to go to the bar. You have to host your guests from the start of the ceremony until the end of the reception and a religious ceremony is not an excuse to be rude.

Yeah, i would decline this invite unless it was for a really close relative. Rude AF

"I don't know that I can avoid a gap altogether because we are having a religious ceremony and my fiance and I want an evening reception "

Actually, you CAN avoid the gap. You choose not to because of what you WANT. There's a huge difference in the word "can't" and the word "won't." You're putting your own want above your guests' comfort, which isn't cool. Same with Malei. Malei, the rude versus broke argument is crap. You either postpone your wedding, you cut the guest list, you cut out unnecessary things, you buy a cheaper dress, you postpone the honeymoon, you scale back on flowers, etc, etc, etc. You always have a choice and it's never a matter of rude versus broke. If this venue you chose was inconveniencing YOU, something tells me you'd find a way to come up with the money for another venue. But because you're not the one being inconvenienced, you don't bother.

This is kind of the point for the cocktail hour. If you can, reschedule it and consider a first look if you need more time for pictures. DO NOT have a 2-hour time block between ceremony and cocktail hour. Everyone will be grumpy and uncomfortable.

Yes, that is way too long of a gap. That's extremely rude to your guests. I suggest a first look if you won't be able to take all your pictures in an hour.

ETA: the most you can push it is a 90-minute cocktail hour. Without a first look, it's not realistic to think you will be able to attend the cocktail hour.

Very rude. Move up the cocktail hour to 4:30pm

Team MIL on this one. Greek Orthodox wedding here, too. Yeah, it's a longer ceremony, so guests will absolutely be ready for cocktail hour as soon as it ends.

I just had a very similar decision to make. I am also having a Greek Orthodox wedding with a gap. Wedding will be from 2-3:30, 1/2 drive to venue, and cocktail hour will start at 5:30.

I have never been to a Greek wedding without a gap. I survived, and so will my guests. If it's truly an inconvenience that is too much for them to bare, they can just join us for the reception.

The invitations will be clear that there's a gap and honestly, that's as accommodating as I can be. I understand and respect those who find it rude but some things are just out of our control.

Mary, it is not out of your control. You just don't want to be accommodating.

Malei, the more you hang around here, the more etiquette you learn.

Yep the gap is rude. When you invite humans to your event you're responsible for them from the start of the ceremony to the end of the reception. It's good hosting.

Elizabeth- that's very presumptuous; it's hard to tell someone else what is/is not in their control. I was just sharing part of my experience and decision. Like I said, I understand where the anti-gap people are coming from. I'm just adding my 2 cents because I think there's value in knowing people are doing things differently, even if they may be considered rude by some.

IMO, it's impossible for your reception start time to be out of your control. If the venue doesn't allow an earlier start, change venues. It's as simple as that. I honestly can't think of any circumstance under which your reception start time would be out of your control.

Literally if you're the one hosting the event, you're in control of everything.

ETA: The decision to be rude and have a gap is yours alone.

@Mary I've never been to a Greek wedding with a gap. And honestly both mine and FH's families would side eye the shit out of that. I can hear my yiayia now- you want to do what?!? And she would be outraged because it would break every law of hospitality and the meaning of parea. So yes, it's rude to have a gap. Can you do it? Well, yes, technically you can. The question is should you, and the answer to that is no, because it's an inconvenience to your guests.

"I will survive and so will my guests" is not the way to treat one of the most important days of your life.

I think if your okay with people possibly not attending the ceremony, just list the times on the invitations.

Most of my catholic family has gaps, granted they are usually 1-1.5 and I've heard of people skipping the ceremony all the time.

I've never been to a church wedding that didn't have a gap. Not saying I like it but i don't think it's rude. I would start the cocktail hour a little earlier if you can, 5:30-6. I don't really think you'll need 2 hours for pictures - that would be super aggravating to me as a wedding party member. An hour is plenty. If you want to go to the cocktail hour, that's totally fine but then try to do a first look and get the pictures done before the ceremony.

Hi, I have a similar situation we are having our ceremony in the same pl as the reception and we don't want to see each other before the ceremony however instead of 2 hr it should only take and hr for pictures. Call it a cocktail hour. I would not call it rude but 2 hrs is a long wait for your guest. Try to minimize the photo time. No one want to go take a na then come back most people come dressed for the evening. I hope this help good luck and congratulations