Catholic Baptism?

An inter denominational wedding typically does not require the non Catholic to become baptized. The only thing that they need to agree to is raising children with an awareness of the Catholic faith.


If fiancé wants the marriage to be recognized as legitimate by the Catholic Church, they will not allow ceremonies to take place outside of the Church walls. Priests who do perform ceremonies outdoors and in non Church venues are not accepted by the Catholic Church to do so nor are they acknowledged as legitimate, though other denominations are not as strict. Because Catholics view it as a serious sacred sacrament with deeper impact.
If you want to marry outdoors, then you can’t have a Catholic ceremony because it goes against their tenets and beliefs. You and fiancé need to decide if being recognized by the Church is important or if the outdoor venue is. You can find a plethora of legal officiants online willing to perform inter denominational Christian ceremonies but they won’t be recognized as legitimate by the Catholic Church.

You can get baptized if you're cohabiting, but you'll likely be strongly encouraged to live separately or to abstain from sex, as you've suggested. It takes 1-2 years to go through the process to enter the church, and yes, there are classes. Look into OCIA or RCIA when you settle into your new city. But as Michelle mentioned, being baptized is not required for you to be able to get married. Consider baptism separately from marriage and only get baptized if that's what you truly want to do. If you're not sure, you can attend OCIA/RCIA classes to learn more without being obligated to enter the Church.

Generally, a Catholic priest will not officiate a wedding ceremony being held outside of a church, although there are exceptions (like weddings between a Jewish person and a Catholic person). But since you want to recite your own vows, it doesn't sound like you really want a Catholic wedding anyway. I think that the bigger question that you and your fiance need to discuss is whether he (or both of you, if you decide to enter the Church) intend to practice the Catholic faith after you're married. If he/you intend to practice, then you should consider getting your marriage convalidated. While you can participate in the life of the church without convalidation, you would not be able to receive Holy Communion.

Hi Heidi! Congratulations on your engagement-that is beautiful! I converted to the Catholic faith and had a Catholic wedding two months ago -- I'd be happy to talk through some of both things with you if it would be helpful over email or the like. A little hard to do so on a forum like this. But above are correct that you do not need to be baptized in order to marry another Catholic, but if the faith is important to your fiancee/you, you guys should check in with your local Catholic Church about making sure that your marriage is recognized by it. The Church doesn't permit writing your own vows, but you do get to choose between a couple options, and you are free to make promises/vows to each other outside the ceremony, such as in the wedding program or during your reception. For me it was helpful to understand the reason behind it-- it is meant to be beautiful and not restrictive -- it's that you're taking part in something that billions of others have, so it shows unity between you and all other people getting married in the faith. The other reason is that your free consent to a lifelong commitment is critical/the most important requirement for a Catholic marriage, so having pre-written vows makes sure that the consent is clear. Anyways, this is all an adventure and there can be different aspects of Catholic weddings, so happy to chat. Here's another resource: https://www.catholicweddinghelp.com/questions/vows.htm#:~:text=In%20other%20words%2C%20it%20would,of%20something%20larger%20than%20themselves.