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Nelia
Dedicated October 2025

Cancer, New Beginnings, Scared?

Nelia, on March 6, 2020 at 8:01 PM Posted in Planning 0 19
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Hi ladies i posted last summer that me and my fiance have had issues last summer but we are doing so much better i got the worse news of my life about a month ago i found out after i went to the dr back in december that i had a breast biopsy last feburary and i found out the day after the biopsy my dr called me and she said i have breast cancer have been the darkest times of my life when i called my fiance at work when i found out while i was at school he called me and he said we will get through this. I found out worse news a few days ago my MRI showed i dont have cancer on my left breast but my right breast is filled with it. Ive been a crying, anixous mess going from being ok to not. I already have bipolar disorder but i just feel this is so much to bear. My fiance also is starting to work things out with my parents who didnt like him much but the issues i was having with my future mother in law last summer when me and my fiance were having issues a few weeks ago has been saying she, my future brother in law and stepfather in law her husband love me so much and are praying for me. I dont know what stage of breast cancer i am but I have invasive ducal carcinoma. I will find out the stage i am and my treatment plan next tuesday while i am on spring break. My fiance has been coming to all my appts hes been strong for me and hasnt cried at all through this and he said if my cancer comes back later on after we are married we will fight it again and again. I have been so devastated we dont plan to change our wedding plans we plan to get married on sept 24, 2022. he said to keep talking to our wedding planner and keep things as normal as possible. i see him tomorrow which i am looking forward to? are there any other brides with cancer planning their weddings? how are you coping with living with cancer or handling diagnosis?

19 Comments

Latest activity by Tara, on March 8, 2020 at 9:30 AM
  • Eshell
    Devoted July 2021
    Eshell ·
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    I just lift you up in prayer. I am NOT sure if you pray but I did for you and your family. Amen Amen
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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    I do i am a christian and ive been trying to lean on god the last few weeks its been so rough. This has been the hardest few weeks of my life.

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  • Eshell
    Devoted July 2021
    Eshell ·
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    Just try to lean on God for understanding...let’s remember that he will NEVER leave you nor forsake you. May he bless you from the crown of your head to the sole of you feet. In Jesus Name Amen Amen Amen
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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    Thank you so so much i need all the prayers i can get !

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    I am sending so many prayers to you and your FH. I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through but that shows what a great husband he will be showing how much he is there for you and strong for you. I pray that you beat this and it does not come back.

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  • Eshell
    Devoted July 2021
    Eshell ·
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    No Thank You for being strong and an inspiration. I pray for healing daily for the sick let’s keep positive.
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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    Yes when i told him the drs to be open to a mastectomy he said he will still love me i called him while he was at working crying about the mri results he said the only one who will see my breasts is him and they can do reconstruction the same day as the mastectomy and he said i could be purple and bald for all he cared and he loved me. i am glad he is here for me.

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    I am trying to lean on god and trust in His plan. I dont want to die but i hope to have a long long life after this.

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    That is when a man truly loves you. God brought him to you for a reason. I am glad I met mine before my mom died as he was really there for me when we were less than 3 years together. That proved how much he was the one for me.

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    Yes hes my soulmate we had issues last summer but me having cancer has brought us closer i know situations like this can either bring a couple closer together or tear them apart my fiance has been so patient with me hes taking me out to lunch tomorrow after i get my haircut tomorrow. I am just scared i dont know what my treatment plan will or when surgery will be . But i should be having surgery soon its been so traumatic and overwhelming taking this all in and ive been grieving as well.

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    It is a scary situation and you are allowed to be scared and upset. Feel how you need to feel. I pray the surgery and treatment will be a huge success.

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    Yes i hope so. i am just sad i will have to withdraw from my spring semester of college its a hard decision but when i come back from spring break i will withdraw. i just pray if they do surgery like a mastectomy they can remove all the cancer but if not i hope i wont be on chemo long i heard always chemo can make you so sick.

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    I think chemo impacts people differently. You need to take care of yourself first so it is ok to make this a priority. I do hope however they need to do it they get the cancer.

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    I hope so i hope by next year i will be cancer free. and we can start planning my wedding by next year. So far i feel ok now just really tried my allergies are affecting me. But I hope treatment wont affect me so much. I hope the cancer hasn't spread. At least thankfully my fiance doesnt want to change our wedding date.

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    I think two years is for sure enough to overcome this and have your wedding of course. You got this! Smiley smile

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    I hope so. I am worried about losing my hair i am cutting my hair tomorrow but my fiance offered to take me to buy a wig if i lose my hair. i am ready for a fun weekend with him. I am so sad to leave my classes for spring semester but the sooner i can leave classes the better i wish i could even continue one of my classes but my immune system will be compromised by treatments soon. Can't take that risk.

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    I understand. Good luck with everything and try to enjoy this weekend.

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  • Nelia
    Dedicated October 2025
    Nelia ·
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    I will thank you. Your advice and talking to me helped so much!

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  • Tara
    Devoted August 2020
    Tara ·
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    I’m so sorry to hear what you are going through. I know numerous breast cancer survivors and I know the road can be long and painful. I have a friend who was diagnosed last year and had a double mastectomy with reconstruction. Her Treatment was successful and she was back to work within 30 days. Research has came a long way, so try not to panic until you know exactly what you are dealing with. I have heard great things about Immunotherapy treatment as well, maybe you would be a candidate for that instead of chemo. I don’t know your location but here in Ohio we just had a new Immunotherapy hospital open due to its success. Keep your head up! You will be in my thoughts and prayers. ❤️
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